cleolinda | Entries tagged with cuteness

Yes, I have seen the Edward Cullen "man pillow" on Etsy (it's half-man, half-pillow, and entirely made of NO), so you can stop sending me the link now. Also, if you haven't sent me the link and you don't know what I'm talking about, you can google that shit yourself because NO. I would also like to say: people, if you're going to be a pillow-molesting deviant, don't PAY for that shit. Get yourself some pillowcases or potato sacks or whatever and some cotton batting from Hobby Lobby and bust out the Rubber Stamp filter on Photoshop because I'm telling you, that's all it is. Keep your crazy homemade. Or just buy a vibrator like normal people, because everyone has needs--that's not the weird part; I'm saying that taking those needs out on innocent, humanoid home furnishings is. For real, you can get a wide variety of sex toys on Amazon these days. You don't have to stoop to this.

@lilithsaintcrow: @cleolinda You know someone will marry that pillow. It will be a WalMart wedding. I will BET YOU MONEY.

@cleolinda: @lilithsaintcrow They'll have to marry the pillow, because you know it won't agree to premarital humping.

Lately, I have become obsessed with the Pallas's Cat (which--HEY LOOK, IT'S A SEGUE--I discovered in the Twilight in Lolcats posts. Geometrical eyebrows sold separately), in no small part because they make the best faces ever. (I can't tell you how many times I've made this face recently.) And I will no longer be able to have a bad day ever again as long as this picture exists on the internet. In fact, I hear there's one at the zoo here in Birmingham; I will have to go visit him. That said, I don't think it'll be very good for his dignity ("WHO IS A PRECIOUS FUZZY BABY? YOU ARE!"), but it'd be a good excuse to get out of the house. And the botanical gardens are right there, and I've been wanting to see them again, maybe do another photo safari. It's a thought.

The Potterdämmerung has a date: the final book will come out July 21, 2007. The Order of the Phoenix movie: July 13th, 2007. God help us all.

Something else I found out about the Radcliffe Equus: Will Kemp is playing the horse. As my sister said, "I'm not sure whether to feel sorry for him or not." It's a great move for his career, or what's left of it after Van Helsing, considering that the play is not only one of the great modern works, but also a huge publicity magnet this time around. On the other hand... he's playing the horse, and Harry Potter's riding.

Meanwhile: 'Harry Potter' stage strip stirs storm; alliteration always awesome.

( Linkspam! Puppy Bowl! )

Current Mood: sick

So, like I said, I did go to the MedHelp clinic early Friday morning. Since a discussion of health care broke out a couple of entries ago, here's how my visit went: ( Read more... )

( Catch-up linkspam )

The Blessing of the Pets in Madrid:

Please, Father, bless my retriever.

And my cat!

Can't I be blessed someplace warmer?

WHAT ABOUT US?

But I'm an atheist!

Current Mood: mmmspaghetti
Current Music: Chicane, "Love on the Run"

1. Sleep.

2. Read Ray Bradbury.

3. Faff around on internet. Go back and tag August entries, because laziness had set in. Despair of going back and tagging all the pre-tag era entries from 2003 - 2005.

4. Avoid Alabama-Hawaii game on TV downstairs, as well as associated shrieking.

5. Sleep.

6. Sunday breakfast. Mmmtoast.

7. Sleep.

8. Faff around on internet. Discover discussion of mythical Jurassic Park 4 on FW. Realize I have bombshell to contribute to discussion; search "cracked out" on journal, dig up old AICN link. Remember this one, guys?

9. Write up linkspam; consider lunch.

Linkspam both frivolous and sobering:

ALIEN MERMAID WTF. I mean, no, it's not real; it's on Snopes. It's just--who said, "You know what, I'm gonna fake a mermaid corpse, but this one, this one's gonna be an alien mermaid"?

Okay, it's time to address the Suri Cruise sculpture. I've seen this linked a few places, and no, Crazy Tom Cruise did not have his mythical baby's first poop bronzed. Number one, she isn't even on solid food yet anyway. Number two, this is from the same sculptor who did the statue of naked Britney Spears giving birth on a bearskin rug. Tom Cruise is crazy, but he ain't this crazy; he had nothing to do with this.

Remember the discussion we had about watching movie casts take shape, and people who didn't get famous roles? This site is for you.

This is the link I was talking about yesterday. It's a trailer for a documentary called The Bridge, wherein the filmmakers spent a year documenting all the suicides at the Golden Gate Bridge, the most suicide-prone spot in the world, apparently, in trying to figure out... why, I guess. ( I'm cutting the rest of this; you may find it extremely disturbing or triggering )

Juxtaposed against that, this site takes on a whole new meaning. It's amazing, though--once the applet has loaded, you can click random dots ("happy," "guilty," "sad") and see real excerpts from online journals. I don't know how they collect them ("12 mins ago"), but apparently the key word in all the sentences is "feel."

And now that I've depressed the hell out of you: here, have a panda dancing. It might make you feel better.

So I have finally talked to my doctor, and I am going to be on three! three! three! medications for the time being--the same Zoloft, a little less Wellbutrin, and tiny increments of Lamictal that we're going to ramp up over the next eight weeks so I don't get Teh Fatal Rash Oh Noes. And if I get Teh Sub-Fatal Rash Zomg, which may or may not involve a tightening of the throat and shortness of breath as well, I need to go to the emergency room and get a shot of Benadryl, because it basically is or is like an allergic reaction, much the way you might have one to peanuts or penicillin or bee stings or morons (I have those a lot).

Meanwhile, your ration of cute for the week.

Aaaaaaand the Ramsey-Karr DNA doesn't match. Shine on, you crazy dicksmack. Shine on, in your THAI PRISON.

"Good evening, you godless sodomites." "I could have lost to Wolverine! He has claws!" My mother, who was watching to cheer on Jack Bauer, is now very fond of some "Jon Colbert" person she keeps talking about.

ladyvoldything: Tom Cruise Wins "Ernie Award" For Sexism.

Ann Coulter runs out of bullshit.

Ron's Quidditch scenes might be cut from OotP film (see also "Weasley is our king," "the loudest fannish wail since... whatever pissed them off in the last movie").

Jim Broadbent to play Judge Turpin in 'Sweeney Todd'? Ooo! Casting is so exciting. Seriously, the casting of anything. I love that quicksand period where you get to watch (from a very distant vantage point) movies, particularly the ones with larger casts, take shape. Like the way that Nicole Kidman's White Witch would have been very different from Tilda Swinton's, and so on. It's like you get a peek into alternate universes for a moment.

(If you dig this kind of thing, you absolutely have to read this book. It cracks my shit up so hard--they'll end a chapter completely straight-faced with something like, "And then, a rising new starlet was chosen to star in Sleepless in Seattle: Demi Moore," and you'll have to go on to the next chapter. It's brilliant. Hell, just look at the title: if I recall correctly, the speaker of that line was Burt Reynolds, and the role was One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest.)

tecno_fairy, this one's for you. Even though I don't think any of the outfits you made are in there, unless you also worked on Pintel and Ragetti. It's still fab.

A fall movie preview. Seriously, did The Illusionist come out already and I just missed it? Did it just not come to Birmingham? Was I just too depressed to notice? (Winnah!)

Going to see Little Miss Sunshine tonight, assuming that I don't find anything else to be allergic to in the next three hours. Also, I finally got around to watching Inside Man this weekend, and it was really, really good. Fie on not seeing things in the theater.

From blinkliz: The Daily Show's coverage of Macacagate, confirming what was basically lurking in my mind the whole time: it kinda sounds like something a toddler would say ("OH NO MOMMY, MACACA!"). Rob Corddry concludes (edda, brace yourself), "It sure as [bleep] sounds racist, but here in Virginia... I'm not sure if that helps or hurts a guy." I like the "OHHHHHHHHH" from the audience after that part.

William H. Macy: Lateness Doesn't Become Lohan. More to the point, "There is not an apology big enough in the world to have to make 150 people scramble. It's nothing but disrespect. And Lindsay Lohan is not the only one. A lot of actors show up late as if they're God's gift to the film. It's inexcusable. They should have their asses kicked."

NYC Officials Want New 'Survivor' Pulled. Meanwhile...

The show's host, Jeff Probst, said the network was aware this season's race ploy might offend viewers. "It's very risky because you're bringing up a topic that is a hot button," he told asap, The Associated Press service for younger readers. "There's a history of segregation you can't ignore. It is part of our history. For that, it's much safer to say, 'No, let's just stick with things the way they are. Let's don't be the network to rock the boat. Let's not have "Survivor" try something new,'" he said. "But the biases from home can't affect you. This is an equal opportunity game."

Probst, what the hell are you talking about?

(I'll tell you what--Phil would never stand for this shit.)

Applebee's taps celeb chef for new menu items. Well, good, because I had takeout from there last weekend and it was awful. The chicken was squeaky, and their idea of salad is lonely lettuce.

Kittens of Darkness motivational posters. (Plus, an answer to our question as to whether pirates beat ninjas or vice versa.) (Hee, "Cosplay.")

Posters: Children of Men (they're mostly text, but the second one creeps me the hell out), Haven (oh, Orlando, you're so butch), and Bridge to Terabithia.

Pictures of movie!Transformers, and apparently people are not happy about them.

Re: John Mark Karr: What's creepier, a man who killed a very young girl, or a man who wishes he had been the one who killed a very young girl?

Austrian girl, held captive for eight years, escapes; captor throws himself in front of train. I don't know why, but I'm slightly fascinated by this story. Why did the door get left open in the first place? Was the guy at all surprised that eight years of (I assume) brainwashing didn't stop the girl from making a break for it the first chance she got? (An example of a similar captive who was allowed to have an outside job and only escaped after the man's wife said, "Hey, you can go.") Did he come down the stairs, see the open door, realize the girl was gone, and go "Oh, shit"? Why did he throw himself in front of the train (which did, in fact, kill him)? I mean, I can think of a lot of very compelling reasons; I'm just wondering what his exact train of logic was.

ETA: Oh my God, "train of logic." That was seriously unintended and horrible. Now I understand why everyone's making stupid puns in the comments.

So, yesterday was my mother's last day at her old job, and she doesn't have a new one lined up yet--the one she was interviewing for turned her down. Because she was overqualified. So... there's that. She's talking to a headhunter now about some opportunities they know about, but she'll basically be at home for at least a week, if not longer ("Looking for a job is my job now!"). Which on one hand could be really fun, because we'll probably go to a movie (I'm all but bribing her to go with me to V for Vendetta) and go out to lunch, probably at Panera while Sister Girl's on duty, at least once. On the other hand: Micro. frickin'. management. So it is in my best interest to get her out of the house and back into a job tout de suite, so I will be focusing all my Good Thoughts powers on getting her a new gig.

Another reason we need her back at work: for the money (duh), in no small part because the pool guy came and removed the tarp and it is scariness. ( What do you make of those marks? )

A few things:

>> Judith Miller's New Excuse: "The former Times reporter tells Vanity Fair the 'slanderous bloggers destroyed her." Interestingly, she does not or cannot name any of the blogs that "slandered" her.

>> Man Shot Dead at Calif. Denny's Restaurant. "The shooting was the third in a Southern California Denny's in three days. In Pismo Beach on Wednesday, a transient with two guns walked into the restaurant at lunchtime, fatally shot two men and wounded a married couple before committing suicide." What the hell is going on down there?

>> Is the new owner of MySpace trying to erode civil liberties? ( It makes scary, scary sense )

>> Holy crap, this stuff is cute. Also, the creator has a livejournal! And is not a criminal!

>> Remark About Gays Shadows St. Pat's Parade. "Dunleavy set off a firestorm this week when he told the newspaper: 'If an Israeli group wants to march in New York, do you allow Neo-Nazis into their parade? If African Americans are marching in Harlem, do they have to let the Ku Klux Klan into their parade?' Referring to the Irish Lesbian and Gay Organization, Dunleavy said, 'People have rights. If we let the ILGO in, is it the Irish Prostitute Association next?'" You know, I find myself saying "OH, FOR FUCK'S SAKE" a lot lately. This is not going to be an exception.

>> Fashion Designer Oleg Cassini Dies at 92. He's the one who dressed Jackie O when she was First Lady, if the name doesn't ring a bell.

>> Her dignity having gone into the Witness Protection Program after three Star Wars prequels, Natalie Portman is now pretty much shame-proof.

(The Phaaaaaaaaaaantom of the Anarchy is theeeeeeeeeere...)