And now I *flop*

[cleolinda]

First off, dollish news: Freakishly Lifelike Joker (With Extra Police Uniform) is available for pre-order and a January release! If you do want this, you may want to reserve yours now, because I think the previous version completely sold out.

THE LITTLEST BELLA IS IMMINENT. (Scroll to the end.) I am advised that she will be shipping next week, in fact. I think it'll take me a few entries to work her in, as I started planning for the worst (JULY, WTF), but I can adjust the story pretty quickly. (As previously mentioned, any and all spare Littlest Edwards will be used as doubles. I did the sorta-twin thing once; I don't think I can manage it again.)

MOAR DOLLS: My Little Ponies that might actually taste like candy; Tonner Warehouse Relocation Sale in NY; I have two things to say about the latest repaint here, and they are: 1) This is a very talented artist. 2) That shit ain't right. I don't even want to contemplate what the eventual owner might do with that.

A note about links to movie parodies, video and otherwise: I wanted to do Watchmen in Fifteen Minutes, but I never did because when I sat down, I just couldn't think of anything to say. And several weeks later, I realized it was because I had seen two or three really funny takes on the original book... so when I sat down to write, all that came to mind were their jokes. So from now on, I might link to parodies of movies I plan on writing about in the future if I happen to see them (the movie sites I watch often post them), but only for y'all to see them--if you specifically want me to watch them, well... it's not going to happen. I'm talking about parodies of things like X-Men/Wolverine, Star Trek, Terminator--all the summer movies, whichever if any I end up trying to write about, but also stuff later in the year. I mean, I'm sure parodists will eventually switch over from Twilight to New Moon, and I won't be able to look at those either. I barely look at them now, even the ones I link.

(I remember that I said to someone once that I couldn't read other people's parodies if I hadn't written my own yet, and whoever it was got really huffy about all the things I was "missing out on." You know what? If it's the only way I can keep doing my own thing, I'm pretty sure I'm okay with that sacrifice.)

ACTUAL LINKSPAM:

Stephen Fry's letter to himself: Dearest absurd child.

Poet Craig Arnold Disappears in Japan.

Girl fights off thugs with marching band baton ("The moral to this story is don't mess with the marching band girls, or you just might get what you deserve").

Which Actress Ruined a Picasso By Drunkenly Throwing a Wine Glass At It? [Blind Items]

Free Comic Book day this Saturday!

The Great Sci-Fi Divide: Why don't we want science fiction on TV?; What's Wrong With Science Fiction TV? [Rant]

Save Our Shows: The fans' choice is 'Chuck'; NBC's Website Freaks 'Chuck' Fans Out.

How 'Lost' Gets Made. Speaking of which: here's what was going on with the "What did you see?" bits during the show last night.

The Dollhouse Gets Down And Dirty In Unaired Post-Apocalyptic Episode.

Let 2.7 Million Trees Bloom: Disney to Make Good on "Earth" Planting Pledge.

Images: New Photo of Megan Fox in Transformers; Exclusive: 'Paper Heart' Poster Premiere; The Poster for McTeigue’s ‘Ninja Assassin’; Three Character Banners for Todd Phillips' 'The Hangover'; Exclusive Look at Jennifer Lynch's 'Surveillance'; Exclusive 'District 9' Photo.

Trailers and clips: New G.I. Joe Trailer Stuffed With Rockets, Suits, Nanomites And Other Splodey New Toys; 'Angels & Demons': Scene featuring Ewan McGregor; Trailer Debut for Nora Ephron's Summer Film 'Julie and Julia'; 'Blood: The Last Vampire' Trailer Premiere; First Three Minutes of 'Food, Inc.' Will Make You Hungry For More; Jessica Biel’s ‘Easy Virtue’: A Tribeca Film Festival Review (with clip); International Trailers Made for One Another: ‘Ponyo’ and ‘Antichrist.’

Sidenote: 'The Last Airbender' Teaser Trailer Attached to Transformers 2.

Box office preview: How big can 'Wolverine' get?; EXCLUSIVE: Hugh Jackman ‘Talking To Writers’ About ‘Wolverine’ Sequel Set In Japan; Everything You Wanted to Know About Wolverine But Were Afraid to Ask; Is Gambit The Most Anticipated Mutant To Debut In ‘X-Men Origins: Wolverine’?; ‘Wolverine’ Star Gambit Keeps It Cool — And Leaves Us Geeky; A ‘Deadpool’ Musical? Ryan Reynolds Talks Solo Spin-Off For ‘Wolverine’ Merc; Wolverine's Ryan Reynolds on swordplay and Deadpool; Will.i.am makes film debut in ‘Wolverine’; Check Out Dominic Monaghan As The Mutant ‘Bolt’ In New ‘X-Men Origins: Wolverine’ Scene!; Exclusive: Wolverine Director Gavin Hood; Hugh Jackman springs to life in sharply directed 'Wolverine'; Review: X-Men Origins: Wolverine isn't a triumph or a disaster—it's just OK; Jackman's 'Pimp' Fears (" 'Hey, my dad's Wolverine.' That's his opening line!"); $4300 on breakfast for fans at the Tempe premiere ("Customer: HUGH").

New Star Trek Pics Take You Back To Starfleet Academy; Don't blink! We unearth a few Star Trek easter eggs; Star Trek's J.J. Abrams on why Bana and Greenwood are key; Abrams: 'Shatner's Kirk Is Dead'; ‘Star Trek’ Star Zachary Quinto Touts Swine Flu Defense Strategy.

New Space Superstar Zoe Saldana Compares The Visions Of ‘Star Trek,’ Cameron's ‘Avatar’; Soderbergh on 'Avatar': "It's The Craziest Sh*t Ever!"

Christian Bale Admits He’s ‘In A Bit Of A Fix’ If Christopher Nolan Declines ‘Batman 3’; Why Isn't Jonathan Nolan Credited for 'Terminator Salvation'?

Exclusive: 'Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince' Character Banners!; New Bezoar Photo, Amycus Carrow, Greyback Wanted Posters from Half-Blood Prince; I See Sea Shells on Shell Cottage; Kloves on Adapting Harry Potter: "Books Are Difficult to Wrestle to the Screen"; "Paranoia" Core of Half-Blood Prince Story Says Dan Radcliffe; Emma Watson on "Mean Girl" Lavender Brown for Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince; Matt Lewis (Neville) talks about Rupert Grint's corpsing + some other stuff; Chicago exhibit welcomes Potter fans to Hogwarts. Behold! My college friend Marcus's report (with pictures) for Chicagoist!

Mike Newell is In Talks to Direct ‘The Lone Ranger.’

First 'Clash of the Titans' Set Photos; Danny Huston to Play Poseidon in 'Clash of the Titans.' Aw, I love him.

Cameron Bright Talks New Moon; Rob Pattinson in People’s 100 Most Beautiful People (I do not think this is going to improve his quality of life, tbh) (although can it really be worse than someone selling a customized doll that looks freakishly like him?); Emily Browning Addresses Her 'Twilight' Notoriety (How in the world is little Violet Baudelaire twenty? How is she older than Kristen Stewart?); Creation Entertainment Twilight Tour Schedule Updates; UCB Group Parodies ‘Twilight’ With Cheeseburgers.

(My mother reports that she spent most of her lunch meeting yesterday playing Horrify the Twilight Noob with an HR department that seemed completely unaware of the entire phenomenon, and she played it all the way down to "vampire C section." BRAVA.)

David Slade to Direct Killer Amphibians Flick 'Cold Skin.' After he directs 'Eclipse,' presumably, which I believe films sometime this fall/winter. Yes, Summit is insane.

Werewolves Found to Howl in 'Dead of Night.'

Katie Cassidy Cast in 'A Nightmare on Elm Street.'

Roger Donaldson to Direct ‘Thomas Crown Affair’ Circa 1911 ('The Day They Stole the Mona Lisa').

'Wall Street 2': Oliver Stone, Michael Douglas to return for sequel, Shia LaBeouf in talks.

The WTF Files: A Movie Called 'The Knight Watchmen'?

Eli Roth Dishes on His ‘Basterds’ Nazi Mini-Movie: ‘What Have I Done?’

Three More Action Projects Lined Up for Bruce Willis.

Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Rainn Wilson, and Natalie Portman in 'Hesher.'

Keanu Reeves in Talks for 'Cartagena,' Clive Owen is out.

EXCLUSIVE: Matthew McConaughey In ‘Loose’ Talks For ‘Dazed And Confused’ Sequel.

Wachowskis’ ‘Shaolin Cowboy’ And Joel Schumacher ‘SilverFish’ Adaptations Get Updates.

We Swing By The ‘Spider-Man: Turn Off The Dark’ Auditions.

Kenneth Branagh Finally Shooting 'Thor' Next January?!

New Comic Book Movie Intentionally Forgetful ['The Forgotten'].

Jim Carrey’s ‘A Christmas Carol’ Will Leave You ‘Blown Away,’ Says Special Effects Master. Related: Robert Zemeckis Thinking of Bringing Roger Rabbit Back?

Will Ferrell, Adam McKay Producing ‘Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters.’

Gervais Playing Short, Fat, Sweaty Loser of His Made-Up Creature Book.

Catherine Zeta-Jones to play Susan Boyle in James Cameron-directed biopic? Not so fast, rumor-mongers.

When The Soap Opera Devil Possesses You, You Get Laser-Beam Eyes And Projectile Vomit [Found Footage]. "But by far the best bit comes around 7:55, when Marlena busts out the aforementioned laser eyes and face-spattering puke." I am so, so sad that this storyline was before my time.

Comments

[greyduck.livejournal.com]

...whoever it was got really huffy about all the things I was "missing out on."

And you know, those things you're missing out on? Since they're on the Internet, they're going to expire before you get a chance to... OH WAIT.

[vega-ofthe-lyre.livejournal.com]

Oh my God, I was about four years old when that Days storyline was airing but I remember it absolutely traumatised me when I caught a few minutes of it when my mother was doing the laundry. Never been able to look at a soap opera the same way thing.

[vega-ofthe-lyre.livejournal.com]

and by "thing", I mean "again". How'd that typo work, brain?

[das-mervin.livejournal.com]

Oh, man. I am sooooooo nervous about the Littlest Bella. Because that can go so many ways. I mean, if she's totally canon, like Tonner Edward (who I call Wardo), she's definitely gonna go after Wardo because he's "prettier" and more of a jerk, and she gets off on assholes. On the other, if she's more movie-style? She'll probably go for L!Edward. And there's the chance that Wardo will reject L!Bella even if she does go for him, because Wardo is canon and thinks nobody is good enough for him--GAH! *panicking*

And that Joker freaks me out. But...I can't stop looking at it. Ever since you featured it, I have a strange desire to buy it, even if I would never sleep again if it was in my house. Kind of like that Cloverfield figure--you know, the huge one that was almost two feet tall.

[nekoro.livejournal.com]

I'm just praying that we don't end up with a recap of the entire AngsTwilight storyline with TLB&E. Once was enough!

Of course, I'm confident that our Cleolinda is good enough to make even that story funny and compelling.

[smirkdoctor.livejournal.com]

I kind of want the RuPaul doll on the repaint link more than the RPattz one...

[laughingacademy.livejournal.com]

Re: the sparklepire repaint, it probably doesn’t help that I’m rereading Live and Let Die and the voodoo thoughts were right at the top of my head already.

ETA: Wait, wait, Ewan McGregor is in Angels and Demons? Oh, shit. (*grumpily adds title to “must see” list*)

[aestasbeyond.livejournal.com]

I had that exact reaction about three hours ago when I found out about Angels and Demons, hahah.

[crumpeteer.livejournal.com]

Yeah, guess which doll that would possibly lock the doors and murder me in my sleep I'm NOT buying.

[callmesyd.livejournal.com]

Please don't bring Roger Rabbit back.

Or, should I say, PLPLPLPLPLPLPLLLLLEEEEEAAAAAAAAAASE?

*tapdances off-stage*

[smirkdoctor.livejournal.com]

Re: Roger Rabbit. The wikipedia page gives some deets on a "prequel". Sounds pretty interesting:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Who_framed_roger_rabbit#Prequel

[wumbawoman.livejournal.com]

Did you see on the "Gage" doll he did the private anatomy?

[the-dala.livejournal.com]

Oh my god that freaked me out. WHY IS THAT NECESSARY?!

[brisingr88.livejournal.com]

How about movie parodies for movies you've already covered?
I don't know if you've seen this, but it made me giggle.

http://www.thatguywiththeglasses.com/videolinks/thatguywiththeglasses/bum-reviews/2741-twilight

[ladytinyhelm.livejournal.com]

Oh. my. god. There are tears of laughter streaming down my face. XD

"Oh, I smell pretentiousness; SHE'S THAT WAY!" *cracking up SO bad*

Thanks for that.

[jackieocean.livejournal.com]

I can't believe someone paid $2,950 for the Edward repaint (http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&ssPageName=STRK:MESCX:IT&item=120407462597). That is INSANE.

[cleolinda.livejournal.com]

Holy Jesus. I am somehow shocked and yet not surprised.

[rabidglow.livejournal.com]

Please tell me that the new repaint doesn't have "hand painted
private anatomy."

[cleolinda.livejournal.com]

If it does, I don't want to know about it.

[lost-garnet.livejournal.com]

You could put the spare TLEs in picture-frames and just tell TLE it's a mirror and that's his reflection.

(Do Meyerean vampires have the no-reflection thing? I want to say no, because they pretty much do nothing vampire-y except drink blood and be-dead-in-theory (but still able to reproduce?) but I don't know if it's ever been an issue...)

[cleolinda.livejournal.com]

They have reflections. Pretty any traditional vampire thing, they don't do it. I mean, they drink blood but they don't even have FANGS.

[emmaorgana.livejournal.com]

The Last Airbender... is going to be a trainwreck of massive proportions. I am so morbidly curious.

[reticent-lass.livejournal.com]

I KNOW. I'm going to be watching TF:RotF anyway, might as well get a first glimpse of the fail. I've already taken a stab at (http://community.livejournal.com/racebending/31773.html?thread=797725#t797725) how the trailer will go over at Racebending, because you know they're going to try dodging as much of the racism accusations as possible.

The movie proper, of course, will be acquired through any means that don't require payment. The drive-in is a definite alternative.

[redcoast.livejournal.com]

He paints their intimate anatomy, so to speak! Tell me Tonner Edward doesn't have any nuts.

[cleolinda.livejournal.com]

Well, I'm sure as hell not about to go look.

[lilyofshalott]

The waterfall custom is my favourite from the MLP link. It's so pretty!

[lunanyteskye.livejournal.com]

I like this one (http://www.flickr.com/photos/requiemart/3480223693/in/set-72157617306097511/) but this (http://www.flickr.com/photos/requiemart/3491302412/in/set-72157617306097511/) just makes me think of The Village People.

[r-a-black.livejournal.com]

and whoever it was got really huffy about all the things I was "missing out on."

Well that's really assholish of them.

[cleolinda.livejournal.com]

It was a couple of years ago, I don't know--it sounded more like "You're depriving yourself of so much!," but yeah, at which point I was kind of like, "Then... that's my problem, I guess?" I couldn't help but wonder if they had tried to link me to something they were involved with, because otherwise, why would you care what I was "missing out on"?

[aestasbeyond.livejournal.com]

Part of me dies a little happy death every time I see Joseph Gordon-Levitt's name. PLUS Natalie Portman, and I'm dead and gone. I can't wait.

There's a little video of him floating around youtube somewhere of him celebrating Obama's win by playing guitar in the streets, and I could have sworn I found it here, but searching back to around that time gives me so such luck...oh wells. :)

MARCHING BAND GIRL IS MY HERO.

[reticent-lass.livejournal.com]

"The moral to this story is don't mess with the marching band girls, or you just might get what you deserve," said Los Angeles County sheriff's Deputy Michael Rust.

He said two men approached the girl from behind, grabbed her coat and demanded money. Deputies searched near Quartz Hill High School for the muggers, looking for a man who was holding his bloodied nose and the other limping.

OMG greatest story ever. I want video of this so hard.

[robinmc.livejournal.com]

Why do I want the Picasso-destroying actress to be Sharon Stone? Like, I would be sad if I found out it was actually someone else; it would ruin the schadenfreude. Why do I feel this way? Yes, I know, I'm going to hell.

And, again, broken record that I am: I love your mother.

[ladytinyhelm.livejournal.com]

Well, according to this article that was linked from the Gawker site that was linked from here... She owns a Picasso. Or did, at the time of the article writing.

So it seems pretty likely. Schadenfreude away!

[dylan-weir.livejournal.com]

Even though the customised Edward doll is made in R. Pattz image, I see stubble on a waxy jaw and think George Michael in the video for 'Faith.'

[ppyajunebug.livejournal.com]

What really terrifies me is the people that hand-paint private parts on the dolls.

[cleolinda.livejournal.com]

I would not be able to do that without laughing my ass off, just at the sheer absurdity of the situation. Of course, laughter is my general response to just about everything, so that's not really saying much.

[undying-rose17.livejournal.com]

Oh my god, the soap opera clip is cracking my shit up. Soap operas just aren't made the way they used to be. I remember when they had the vampire/angel/demon storyline on Port Charles and back when every soap opera was copying Passions with its crazy supernatural stuff.

[gannet-guts.livejournal.com]

Omg, the Marlena storyline! My dad and I were riveted to the tv screen for the reruns. Good times.

I saw Wolverine on Wednesday night. Was alright. Not best! movie! ever!, but enjoyable. Gambit was decent enough as well.

[clodia-risa.livejournal.com]

How was Deadpool?!

[headphone.livejournal.com]

OH NO YOU DI-INT.
The whole Marlena possession with John Black as priest was when I originally started watching Days. I think I was about seven or eight at the time.

[sapphires13.livejournal.com]

Same here. My whole family got into the show because of that.