No sparkle motion footage leaked! I AM SHOCKED

[cleolinda]

Okay, we're back. If you missed it due to the LJ outage (and you keep up with the Twi-spam), go back and read last night's Twilight premiere entry. It's a post where Cloverfield, Tyra, tomorrow night's South Park and an alternate-universe True Blood collide, let's put it that way. Also, the anti-Twilight commentfest is still going, so don't miss that. (Speaking of that, apparently batman_lulz has joined in now.)

(unicorn13: "Just wanted to pop in for a mo' and say... all trolling reports regarding the poll comments are pretty much true. Twatlight came in eventually, but this one was pretty much solid ONTD.")

(Yeah, but Twatlight is here: Robert Pattinson Answers YOUR Questions! Well, not anymore he won't.)

(Okay, 'fess up: How many of the irate commenters on the "Disney's obsession with Bolt" entry are y'all?)

Meanwhile, lunylucy braved the hordes and got a Sparklypoo t-shirt signed. (The back story on Sparklypoo.)

Looks like Twilight premiere fuggings are starting to go up, so keep an eye out for those.

Defamer's recap: "Back outside, co-stars Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart met their tearful fans, some of whom had come from as far as Honduras to gulp wildfire air and squeal urgent, carpet-side appeals to 'bite them.' And that was just the Entertainment Weekly staff." OH YES THEY WENT THERE.

(Gawker: If He Were A Real Vampire, He'd Be Signing Blank Pieces Of Paper. And, Um, This 'Open Caption' Would Be Blank, Too [Open Caption]. Yes, but fortunately there are no real vampires in Twilight. Yes, I went there.)

Entertainment Weekly: 'Twilight': Bella-Jacob's stormy scene; Shrieking masses descend on L.A. for the 'Twilight' premiere. “With every week, the fervor and anticipation seems to grow. This is my life. People know my name and ambush me in public and try to figure out what hotel I’m staying at and ask me to bite them and want to touch my hair. I have accepted it as real now, but it still feels surreal.” More:

Pattinson, Cam Gigandet, and a few other actors even did a victory lap to slap fan hands after they had completed their initial round of interviews and fan appreciation despite holding up the screening over 45 minutes past its scheduled start time.

Hee, so I did see that.

After witnessing the phenomenon first hand, I’m not sure it even matters if the final product is Oscar-worthy. (In fact, two Oscar winners, Jaime Foxx and Kim Basinger, used their influence to score the hot tickets for their obsessed offspring.) Hours in, I was still having to shout my interview questions at the top of my lungs because the “Team Edward” cries were being matched by the howls of the Jacob-supporting wolf pack.* In this economic downturn, people had obviously spent a pretty penny getting there, getting takeout from local restaurants, decorating the windows of their cars, outfitting themselves in branded merch. “I’d hate to have to be the guy who has to clean all this up afterward,” Gigandet said, referring to the discarded water bottles, sunscreen and snack trash.

MTV: 'Twilight' Premiere: Robert Pattinson Loses His Hearing, Taylor Lautner Gets An Indecent Proposal (photo gallery).

Twilight Lexicon premiere roundup, including links to coverage from the Associated Press, Access Hollywood, USAToday, US Magazine and Entertainment Tonight.

ONTD: Cam Gigandet @ 'Twilight' movie premiere.

Exclusive Interview: Twilight 's Kristen Stewart; Interview: 'Twilight' Director Catherine Hardwicke.

Back from the "how much is too much" article that I made the mistake of only skimming: "When some of the Twilight cast members attended the ‘Much Music’ event in Toronto on Saturday the 15th of November, Rob was curled up in a ball during the interview session. He said that it was the only position that made him feel safe – that it was his ‘safety blanket’. Somehow, that really disturbed me. Why should he feel terrified? Why wasn’t he relaxed, sitting upright and smiling like Nikki or Rachelle?"

Um, could it be because of this?

Just the other day, Pattinson realized, "there were some girls who had scratched ... the side of their necks so [they were] freshly bleeding when they came up to get a signature. "They were like, 'We did this for you.' I didn't know what to say. 'Um, thanks guys?' "

EVERYBODY OUT OF THE POOL, OUT, GET OUT NOW.

Comments

[luna-k.livejournal.com]

First comment omg? Wow.

Hey Cleo, have you seen this (liberal) blog post (http://bravenewfilms.org/blog/62927-the-politics-of-vampires-and-wizards) about the politics of Twilight vs the politics of Harry Potter? Interesting stuff.

[madelrocio7.livejournal.com]

Lmao. No leaking? That is a surprise. I kinda don't want to see it until Friday. I have a feeling I might start laughing. Laughing pretty bad. And I like Twilight.

[divadeanna.livejournal.com]

Nuh-UH, Entertainment Weekly. No. You are not getting away with that one. I wasn't one of the posters, but I definitely am now. *jaw agape at the blatant hypocrisy*

[divadeanna.livejournal.com]

On another note, has anyone seen any reviews of this thing yet? Or are critics not allowed to release them until closer to Friday?

[abbreviated-kt.livejournal.com]

D: @ rob in the fetal position.

[cupcake-goth.livejournal.com]

Just the other day, Pattinson realized, "there were some girls who had scratched ... the side of their necks so [they were] freshly bleeding when they came up to get a signature. "They were like, 'We did this for you.' I didn't know what to say. 'Um, thanks guys?' "

I ... WHAT? NO.

1. Those girls need help. I'm not kidding. They need someone to explain the difference between fantasy and reality to them, possibly in small words and with flash cards.

2. So Twilight really IS the craziest fandom, no contest. Now we know.

[iwanttobeasleep.livejournal.com]

What I thought when I read that. HP has nothing on them anymore.

[ppyajunebug.livejournal.com]

...wait, so their necks were bleeding? Did they expect him to lick it or something?

I'm kind of afraid of this turning into the "Bewitched, Bothered, and Bewildered" episode of Buffy....

[saxonb.livejournal.com]

I'm kind of afraid of this turning into the "Bewitched, Bothered, and Bewildered" episode of Buffy....

By the sound of it, it's already there. All they need is Alyson Hannigan with an axe, and they'll have all the crazy they need to qualify...

[anthraxpretzels.livejournal.com]

...S'gonna be a lonnnng week.

Any chance the crazies will still be watching Twilight for the third time Friday? Me and a few friends are going then.

[robinmc.livejournal.com]

Ok, I can't even laugh at the neck-scratching girls. That's just absolutely horrifying.

(Wait, yes I can: they would probably think that the DJ Bobo video is a towering artistic achievement, marred only by the absence of RPattz.)

I think it's interesting to note that both Basinger and Foxx have tween daughters, and probably the only reason they were at the premiere was to buy their kids' love make the kids happy.

[fangulation.livejournal.com]

THEY SCRATCHED THEIR NECKS? Dear lord why?! What part of the forsaken book was this in? Edward only bruised her, silly girls, you're doing it wrong.

[maramala.livejournal.com]

By "forsaken book" are you referring to the Book of Revelation, or one of Nostradamus' quatrains?

Sounds like another sign that the End Times are here, personally.

[malhablada.livejournal.com]

Ugh, you know what pisses me off? I want to see that movie. Like it or disdain it, it's going to be HUGE, and I want to see it. Unfortunately, I think I would die of *eyeroll* if I was forced to sit in a theater of girls gasping orgasmically every time Cedric came onscreen.

I also think I'd be too embarrassed to buy a ticket for it. God, what if the person at the counter thought I actually loved it? Is going with a big group of people better or worse than just going with a couple people?

[prix-etoile.livejournal.com]

I'm going opening night for my friend's bday and I'm standing next to the people who have not read the books and are going just for her.

And I'm going to look PAINED the entire time to make sure people know I'm there for the lulz. OR MAKE A SHIRT. THAT SAYS "HERE FOR THE LULZ" DKSFJLS

[trampchic.livejournal.com]

[[Just the other day, Pattinson realized, "there were some girls who had scratched ... the side of their necks so [they were] freshly bleeding when they came up to get a signature. "They were like, 'We did this for you.' I didn't know what to say. 'Um, thanks guys?' "]]

HOLY SHIT. I am aware of the fact that this could be put more coherently, but OMG HOLY SHIT. (Note for the future, fangirls: the TomStu t-shirt idea was MUCH BETTER.)

[beccly.livejournal.com]

Just the other day, Pattinson realized, "there were some girls who had scratched ... the side of their necks so [they were] freshly bleeding when they came up to get a signature. "They were like, 'We did this for you.' I didn't know what to say. 'Um, thanks guys?' "

D: D: D: D:! That is just....wow. That's a bit scary.

[gwynnywonk.livejournal.com]

I think I just realized that these people are going to BREED. Or already HAVE.


I am so squicked out now.

[mustang-bex1126.livejournal.com]

Fuck... and are probably more likely too... ewwwwwww

[eponine-b.livejournal.com]

Wow! Not like it wasn't to be expcted but some of the questions being posted for RP on the Ellen website are so cringeworthy (and classic teenaged fangirl) but the worst part is at least one of the posters called him Edward - thats.....kinda creepy.

[gwynnywonk.livejournal.com]

Also, thought you might like this if you haven't seen it already> http://www.accesshollywood.com/mantz-rantz-twilight_video_838561

The closest to a review we're going to get before Friday, but honestly very little surprising contained therein besides a bad pun. all the same it's nice to see that at least one entertainment site isn't taking the EW route.

[timeofnoreply.livejournal.com]

Aw, RPattz. D: This gets less funny, the more I read things like how he curls up into a little ball o' sad at events.

[anadandy.livejournal.com]

My god - these women realize that Taylor is only SIXTEEN years old, right? Right?! I am so ashamed of my age demographic right now.

[hikare.livejournal.com]

Oh god, the twatlight comments in that Ellen post make up for all the creepy fangirl ones.

Dude, I want my hat back. Steal clothes from Tom, not from me.

Ellen can you get my hat back for me??

Posted by jacksper rathbone | November 15, 2008 11:18 PM

I giggled like an asthmatic guinea pig, I'm not gonna lie.

[z-k.livejournal.com]

"Pattinson realized, "there were some girls who had scratched ... the side of their necks so [they were] freshly bleeding when they came up to get a signature"

...

These girls are sick. They are seriously deranged.

[spectralbovine.livejournal.com]

You're famous again (http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/27788655/).

My favorite “Twilight”-related blog, the hilarious loves-it-and-hates-it-and-is-totally-obsessed-with-it “Cleoland,” at http://cleolinda.livejournal.com/ (note to readers: adult discussion and language sometimes exists on this particular blog, so don’t say you weren’t warned), puts it this way: “Yeah, it’s like, Bella wants to be a vampire but she doesn’t want to be a vampire before she’s had sex as a human, and Edward doesn’t want her to be a vampire but he wants to get married, but Bella doesn’t want to get married unless she can be a vampire, but Edward won’t have sex with her until they get married, and then you put the fox and the grain in the boat and you leave the goose back on the riverbank.”

Haaaaa ha ha ha ha. I heart logic puzzle jokes. ...I don't think I've ever seen one before! But I so heart them now and forever!

[cleolinda.livejournal.com]

You've never heard it? You have a fox, a goose, a bag of grain, and a boat that can hold only two items. You send the fox over with the goose, fox eats the goose. You send the goose over with the grain, goose eats the grain. How do you get across the river?

In retrospect, the answer seems kind of obvious.

I... uh. I just realized what the rest of your comment said. Oh Jesus. I WRITE ABOUT THINGS OTHER THAN TWILIGHT, FOR GOD'S SAKE!

[dreamingreader.livejournal.com]

I think I'm going to swing by my local theater to witness the lines. And the screaming. And, obvio, the LULZ.

Twilight mania is totally making my week right now

[iamshadow.livejournal.com]

Rob was curled up in a ball during the interview session. He said that it was the only position that made him feel safe – that it was his ‘safety blanket’.

I am literally waiting for the news that he's retiring from the public eye to 'spend more time with his family'. He's got 'impending nervous breakdown' written all over him, and it makes me feel ill.

[caerbannog.livejournal.com]

Or hospitalized for 'exhaustion'. Yeah, I wouldn't be surprised either.

[ironclad1609.livejournal.com]

Hey there.
I am only superficially browsing through your entries of this week (because the word Twilight makes me somewhat sick and I just want it to be over, but hey, each to their own) so maybe I just missed it, but...did you actually write somewhere how you found Quantum and not just the title song? :P

Personally, I liked it even better than Casino.

Cheers ^^

[cleolinda.livejournal.com]

No, I haven't actually talked about it at length yet. I was trying to see if I could write Something Else about it, but I'm just not feeling it yet, for some reason.

[lalumena.livejournal.com]

From the Ellen questions: (http://ellen.warnerbros.com/2008/11/robert_pattinson_answers_your.php?page=4)

P.S just cause i make shoe's, t-shirts and jacket's with you on them doesn't mean im obsessed gosh

RUN ROB RUN NOW.

[anaroriel.livejournal.com]

[i]Just the other day, Pattinson realized, "there were some girls who had scratched ... the side of their necks so [they were] freshly bleeding when they came up to get a signature. "They were like, 'We did this for you.' I didn't know what to say. 'Um, thanks guys?' "
EVERYBODY OUT OF THE POOL, OUT, GET OUT NOW.[/i]

No way. Just no way. That's sick. You're not fucking kidding, that just went over a line right there.

o_O I don't think I want to see it at all now. That's just too sick.

*Backs away slowly*

Wow, I just can't get over that. *shudders*

Maybe I'll go to the movie theater and pass out pyschiatrists' cards to the girls waiting in line. Perhaps invest in a special hotline for Twilight fans.