I can't believe I'm doing this

[cleolinda]

Okay, look. I can't be at the computer a whole lot and I can post links even less, particularly since I'm cleaning madly for the lunchtime electricians, but we have got to get a few things out of the way because this is the subject of half my inbox this morning:

Yes, I have seen the sparklecock. Yes, you too can now own your own unofficially Twilight-themed glitter dildo. Well, technically I haven't looked at it yet, although I have read the description ("THROW IT IN THE FRIDGE FOR THAT AUTHENTIC EXPERIENCE"?), because I am on the family computer and I will never, ever be able to explain this.

And yes, Edward's life-size shadow can watch you while you use it.

Excuse me, I have to go bleach my mind's eye now.


(Also, Amazon's Tonner prom exclusive Bella has her own little leg cast. Apparently the doll's product name--the way the SDCC Edward exclusive was "Hungry"--is "Turn Me." I... I really don't like thinking about all three of these items being in the same room.)

Comments

[elbales]

O_O

WHUT

TWIHARDS WITH NO LIVES, LET ME SHOW YOU THEM.

[jubilantia.livejournal.com]

WOOOOOOOOOW

[mazarin221b.livejournal.com]

Hee! It's *pink*. Not pale flesh or whateverthehell, it's glittery, baby pink. And might just be the most disturbing thing I've seen in quite a while. And the encouragement to useit outside in the sun...well...shudder.

[ailaes.livejournal.com]

That is wrong on SO many levels, I can't even begin.

~shudders~


If I had Edward on my wall I'd never ever get any sleep. Spike on the other hand...I could live with that.

[journeyjones.livejournal.com]

So...methinks that Tonner prom Bella is totally a mandoll. Not that I'm opposed, but wow - that forehead is about a mile wide

[ms-creant.livejournal.com]

I have a feeling if Bella had either of these products, New Moon wouldn't have happened.

[wednesday]

Is it bad that my reaction was "Oh, neat; Tantus made that?"

[divadeanna.livejournal.com]

I posted this on my LJ as well, and every single comment starts with, "THROW IT IN THE FRIDGE FOR THAT AUTHENTIC EXPERIENCE ARE YOU KIDDING ME!??!" or some variation of that. I'm torn between being horrified and being amused. lol

[krazycat.livejournal.com]

Excellent comment from the youtube video:
"I know what you are"
"say it"
"DILDO"

[chellytastic.livejournal.com]

i spose 'turn me' is more appropriate then oh, venomize me, or something.
i kept thinking 'turn me' as indancing? she doesnt like dancing oh wait vampire-blood-venom-change-death=turn.
oh okay.

[cains-underoos.livejournal.com]

Be safe.

Always use a condom.

[fireflower314.livejournal.com]

Okay so the dildo was something I just kind of meh-ed at (I mean seriously, it took them this long to make those?!) but that shadow? YIKES.

[sunni-sideup.livejournal.com]

NOOOOO. Fandom, stop making us all look crazy!

[darkfrog24.livejournal.com]

The sex toys were only a matter of time.

The wall shadow, while creepy, is at least the first of it's kind I've seen. There are Hello Kitty sex toys and Jesus sex toys... At least it's new.

[sapphire-etoile.livejournal.com]

I haven't read all of the comments yet, but someone else must have mentioned this before me...

The two, tiny words that did me in and made me spray fried rice across my kitchen floor as I choked/laughed hysterically?

"I Sparkle" is written on the base.


Actually, I think I've been half waiting for this to happen.

[skellington7d.livejournal.com]

Is it just me or does the prom Bella looks a lot more like Kristen Stewart than the other one? It might just be that she has the right hair color.

[numbedtoe.livejournal.com]

What's sad is that I know a couple of people who'd probably order that dildo.

[lady-elessar.livejournal.com]

First thought was.... Who got to pick sparkledo's color?

"No, no, too sparkly."

"Wait, not pale enough"

*facepalm*

Can peroxide be used in lieu of bleach? >_

off topic

[dorfird.livejournal.com]

I've tagged you here: http://dorfird.livejournal.com/20587.html

[eleanor-panno.livejournal.com]

... Who thought of the shadow idea? However they were, well, they aren't normal, are they?
It is bone chilling. Especially the 'be safe' bit. I don't think it is 'safe' to have a vampire silhouette plastered on your wall. It is dangerously creepy, that's what it is.

What will they think of next?

[elbales]

Hey, Cleo, a friend put this adorable and hilarious video in his Facebook. Seems to me you can use a laugh.

"Penguins rule, orcas drool," as my friend put it.

I think I may need to kill myself.

[ohemgeeitsfishy.livejournal.com]

I looked at both of those links while on videochat.
My best friend now has a recording of my in an upright fetal position rocking back on forth, crying and mumbling to myself, "This cannot be real. This cannot be real." I really. Really. Hate. Twilight.

[coyotegoth.livejournal.com]

Utterly random, but happy 3,000th entry!

Milestone

[suzeclues12.livejournal.com]

Oh, great - a huge milestone and it's all sparkling dildos and stalker self-apply shadows......

Of course, it's also, GREAT coverage of .... the crazy (chugging the bleach, going to store fore more).

[amaz0n-princess.livejournal.com]

I don't even know what to say to any of that....