Happy Sparklemas!

[cleolinda]

The Made of Fail podcast is up! Aaaaand it's Twilight-themed, because you knew it would be, but we discuss the crazy-ass fan phenomenon as well as the movie--Kevin even threw a clip from the Stephenie Meyer Is Crazy interview in there. OH OH OH also? You know what you get? We were talking about the box office, so I went over to ew.com while we were recording, and you can actually hear the moment I found out they were saying that Twilight made $70M for the weekend (they've since downgraded that number a smidge, to, like, $69.99999M)--you hear this shriek of "JESUS CHRIST! OH MY GOD!" right in the middle of the podcast, and Dayna going "HOW? HOWWWW?"

Also, in the second half, we had a really interesting conversation about the shift from radio airplay to internet distribution in the music industry. Or at least, I thought it was really interesting.

(Audio samples: In which I admit that I am, in fact, a "Twilight blogger" [1:02]; Angel wings and glaucoma [1:40].)

First batch of Twilight/15M icons: there's already 40+ and I haven't even dealt with the meadow yet. (There's a lot of movie stills and caps out there, and I find it really relaxing to faff around making icons, so... indulge me. And take whatever you want, make your own, I'll link them here, two thumbs up, fine holiday fun.)

So I took my mother to see the movie yesterday, and her verdict ("You gotta give me an official statement, they said they wanted to know what you think") is "I really liked it," although this was said in a thoughtful, somewhat surprised tone. And she got confused a lot by who was who and what the mechanics of sparklepirism were; she missed the part where Edward speed-moed around the Volvo to open Bella's door (which cracked my shit up) because she was so busy asking me... you know, I can't even remember what.

Oh! OH! I WAS SEATED TWO SEATS AWAY FROM A GENUINE TWILIGHT NOOB IN THE PROCESS OF BEING HORRIFIED. He had come with a female friend (girlfriend?) and was like, "What is this about? It's a PG-rated vampire movie? Is it, like... set in medieval times?" Once again, the theater was worshipfully silent, but I heard a few quiet chuckles out of him now and then. Oh, and when Edward blithely admitted that he'd been in Bella's room every night for two months watching her sleep, I heard this tiny muffled "JESUS!!" from two seats away. That was fun. Of course, I got really worried that he could hear me whispering explanations to my mother, because oh God, he's going to think I'm one of them. And then it occurred to me--you know, I'm not one of the crazy people rioting at Hot Topic, but... Twilight has eaten way too much of my brain for me to act like I'm better than anyone. So... yeah.

(I am beyond feeling bad about helping fill this movie's coffers. The leads have been rewarded with supermega-bonus money that will now allow them to buy secret lairs where they can hide from the crazy, and I have gotten way too much mileage out of this series to begrudge the studio two matinees' worth of ticket money. You can feel however you want about your own financial contribution or lack thereof, obviously, but I have to admit that I don't personally have any room to talk. Twilight has given me a lot this year.)

And then, everything went to hell. We were in the big fight scene, and right before Edward was going to tear James's throat out, THE MOVIE STOPS. The lights come on, everyone's freaking out ("What happens! WHAT HAPPENS?!"), a manager comes in and says that they had a power outage or something and they're going to get the movie back up and running. And then it comes back on: Bella voiceovering, "Death is peaceful." A clutch of preteen girls (who apparently were seeing this for the first time) behind us started screaming "WHAT? NOOOOOO!" Then management started rewinding and fast-forwarding all over the place; they sped through the hospital scene with Bella's mom and then took us all the way back to Bella running out on her dad, and we watched that for a couple of minutes (my mother grumbling the whole way), and THEN they rewound it AGAIN, all the way back to the Bad Vamps crashing Vampire Baseball, and then people REALLY started shouting. (For some reason, I just found the whole ordeal hilarious. You are probably not surprised by this.) And it was one of those things where everyone's yelling at the projectionist, who I don't think can hear them anyway or might have even left the booth at that point, and no one's actually getting up to do anything about it (maybe because they all think someone else already has), so finally I just leapt up, threw my purse at my mother ("HOLD THIS"), and bounded out into the lobby. What I figured was, I couldn't tell if anyone else had already seen the movie, but I knew I had, so if it started up again, me missing something was no big deal. The preteens' mother was also out there, helplessly trying to tell the assistant manager (who I think may have been the same shell-shocked girl I chatted with on Saturday--she'd had to work the Thursday midnight shows) where the movie had stopped, and I just said, "Go back to the part where he broke her leg!" (The girls' mother cried, "That's a really good way to describe it!," like I had just discovered the solution to some geometric theorem.) So I went back and yelled "HEY GUYS, THEY'RE WORKING ON IT" to the theater at large, and FINALLY, we got back to the leg-breaking and the rest of the movie played without incident.

It's actually really unusual for me to get up and take charge like that--my mother laughed about it afterwards--but I was like, I'll be damned if we're gonna sit here and fuck around for an hour with everyone screaming and no one actually doing anything. For some reason, I am really comfortable in a movie-viewing context--like me actually chatting with the manager girl the other day and saying, you know, "Oh my God, how crazy was it? Were there any survivors?" There's a lot of conditions under which I will say nothing and suffer in silence, but if it has to do with movies, apparently I have no fear.

So... that was my Tuesday. I don't think I'll be doing linkspam today (I didn't do it last night either, did I?). It's Thanksgiving week, not a lot of people (well, not a lot of Americans) are online, not a whole lot is happening, and I want to post here in some capacity every day because I've had a perfect-attendance streak for two or three months now, but I'm going to take it easy and try to rest a little. I don't know--I just feel so drained (insert your own vampire joke here) from the last week or so. Not in a bad way--just like I need time to recharge.


(Oh, by the way, I forgot to link this here: enjoy screencaps of Movie!Bella's brief kinky old-fashioned vampire movie fantasy.)

Comments

[somewhereapart.livejournal.com]

I have to say... I have neither read the books nor seen the movie, but after reading your LJ and your Twilight in 15 Minutes, I find myself oddly tempted.

[marenfuga.livejournal.com]

You know, I thought your icon actually said sparkling *headdesk*

CREEPER!

[ilwitchgrrl.livejournal.com]

"Oh, and when Edward blithely admitted that he'd been in Bella's room every night for two months watching her sleep, I heard this tiny muffled "JESUS!!" from two seats away."

When we saw it, there was a girl about two rows behind us who muttered (none too quietly) "CREEPER" at that moment.
Cracked us up! That's become our new catch phrase.

Re: CREEPER!

[scarletsherlock.livejournal.com]

I just LOL'ed in real life, at work. CREEEEPER. I hope I don't get fired. XD

[bigeyedrabbit.livejournal.com]

And then it occurred to me--you know, I'm not one of the crazy people rioting at Hot Topic, but... Twilight has eaten way too much of my brain for me to act like I'm better than anyone.

Lady, I'm right there with ya.

(By which I mean, I'm the very same way, not, Damn right you're not better than anyone or anything rude like that.)

[shadowcat]

Yay! You made "Vampire Volvo Of Great Justice" icons. I think that was one of my favorite lines ever in your Twilight in 15 Minutes. :D

[maxiekatt2.livejournal.com]

The movie broke for us on opening night and it wound up taking three hours to watch a two hour movie. It was like being trapped on a sinking ship surrounded by tweens. The best part was when four cops came in with the theater guy as he told us it was going to take a couple of minutes to fix it - there was fear in his eyes and rightly so.

[cleolinda.livejournal.com]

Heeeeeeee, that's awesome. In a scary way.

[mustang-bex1126.livejournal.com]

Kick off your shoes, put your feet up, lean back, and just enjoy the melody my dear- I won't give that tripe my own cash, but I love it all the same in the context of your blogging and viewership- you've definitely EARNED the right to NOT entertain the masses from time to time, so do it! And Happy Thanksgiving to Mom, your(awesome) stepdad, and sistergirl.

[sun-star-n-moon.livejournal.com]

Just saw twlight last night. Me and my cousin were taking bets on how long it wold take before we both started laughing like crazy. I thought it would be the great meadow of sparkling part, but I was wrong.

I didnt make it through the first spoken line of the movie.

[phnelt.livejournal.com]

I just had to pause in my silent lurkerdom to mention that when Edward revealed his whole watching her sleep thing, my whole theatre audience went 'ewwww!'. So I guess that's Canadians for you.

[cleolinda.livejournal.com]

Hee! Well, at least y'all have your heads on right. More people should be freaked out by that whole exchange. Particularly since he was totally just like, "Yeah, I watch you sleep, it's pretty awesome. Can I kiss you now?"

[spectralbovine.livejournal.com]

Oh my God, that sounds like a lolarious experience indeed. What a part to suddenly cut out at, huh? Go you for taking charge!

[prncssaurora.livejournal.com]

Heh, yeah. I have no shame anymore - I went to see it again after work last night. The theatre was pretty empty though, which was nice.

Although, when I was at the register getting my ticket, three excited tween girls got in line behind me, and my cashier sort of jerks her head in their direction and whispers to the cashier next to her, "Twilight, I bet you 10 bucks." The other cashier was like, "I KNOW Twilight, you don't bet me ANYTHING." Hee.

stupid question

[teslaroo.livejournal.com]

So wait...when she first dreams of Edward, wakes up, sees him watching her, she looks back and he's gone...
He was really there right? The movie made it seem as though she imagined him standing there.

Re: stupid question

[cleolinda.livejournal.com]

See, in the books, she just dreams of him in a forest setting, I think. In the movie? I truly feel like we are meant to think--or realize later--that he really was there. I think by that point in Midnight Sun, he really has started watching her sleep. And I LOVED that they put that in--even if it was supposed to be a dream, it was freakin' creepy, and I liked that they went there with it.

[writergirl-1720.livejournal.com]

LOL!!!! Who would have thunk Twilight could pull so many punches! Love it!
As for what Twilight has brought me this year? hmmm a lot of laughter and I found cleolinda! So for that I am truly thankful. This LJ has become my new guilty pleasure.

[sertcake.livejournal.com]

agreed. twilight has brought me here as well, and now its my daily fun site

[greyduck.livejournal.com]

Oh, wow. That's far, far worse than any movie-viewing disaster I've witnessed. And good on you for finding your safe spot for taking charge! *grin*

[padawansguide.livejournal.com]

HTTN is the best game ever!

And wow - I can't believe all the wacky fast-forwarding and rewinding.

I had something sort similar when I saw Titanic for the first time. Like a half hour in, when we are finally going back to the Titanic past, the film burned and melted right in front of our eyes. After they couldn't fix it, they told us to come back to the next showing. Which was so jam packed with two showings worth of people, we had to sit in the front row with the screams of the dying like 2 inches in front of us. I'm still traumatized.

[padawansguide.livejournal.com]

OH, and for not-very-good books, I feel like Twilight has brought me a crap-load of entertainment this year, so I feel the same as you!

[cellardoor28.livejournal.com]

It doesn't open here yet, but Empire (http://www.empireonline.com/) magazine is out and has given it 4/5. I'm slightly staggered :p

[awanderingbard.livejournal.com]

Totoro!

[charmingdetails.livejournal.com]

Cleolinda Jones: singlehandedly saving Twilight screenings from certain doom. :D

First-time poster here- I just wanted to delurk to say thank you for all the Twilight lulz. I love the books (in a guilty-pleasure sort of way) and your recaps and movie coverage are sheer awesomeness. You rule!

[cleolinda.livejournal.com]

Aw, thanks. : )

[teirkin.livejournal.com]

And then it occurred to me--you know, I'm not one of the crazy people rioting at Hot Topic, but... Twilight has eaten way too much of my brain for me to act like I'm better than anyone. So... yeah.

I am so there.

[sirius20-81.livejournal.com]

sadly i have to raise my hand here too...

[artemis-archer.livejournal.com]

You know I was really torn about seeing Twilight because on the one hand I knew it'd be hilarious and worth the student discounted six bucks but on the other I cringed at the thought of giving a single cent of my money to the insanity of it all. In the end a friend invited me "for the lulz" and when I realized that I still had a free movie pass that I'd gotten this one time I donated blood, the opportunity was too appropriate to pass up.

I laughed the whole time and got to see the HBP trailer on the big screen so no regrets here.

[spacetomatoes.livejournal.com]

You... you got in to see Twilight for free from a time that you donated blood?!?

That is the most perfect, appropriate, and hysterical thing I've heard all day!

[new-world-smurf.livejournal.com]

I have read the books, have not seen the movie but OH DEAR GOD am I tempted. My husband, clueless pop culture innocent that he is, said to me the other night "what's all this Twilight stuff about?" I replied "teenybopper vampires who sparkle."

"Is it a comedy?"

"Depends on how old you are."

[teirkin.livejournal.com]

"Is it a comedy?"

"Depends on how old you are."

Win.

[robinmc.livejournal.com]

And then it occurred to me--you know, I'm not one of the crazy people rioting at Hot Topic, but... Twilight has eaten way too much of my brain for me to act like I'm better than anyone. So... yeah.

You know, I'm getting there. I kind of had this unspoken thing, that I wasn't going to have any Twilight icons, and now I have two. Oh well.

Did you see the photos of Kristen Stewart smoking a bowl on her front porch? Subtext: "Rob, the who-gives-less-of-a-shit ball is now in your court."

[cleolinda.livejournal.com]

Hee, yes. Wow. ON HER FRONT PORCH, seriously. That is some seriously not giving a fuck. I shudder to think what Robert Pattinson will have to do to top that.

[awanderingbard.livejournal.com]

I applaud your movie rescuing, Cleo! I went to see the filmed last show of RENT at the movie theatre, for which my friend and I paid $23 each for tickets, and the sound went out of synch for Act 2. My friend (who was really only there because I needed someone to go with, not because she was really into musicals like me) got up to go tell somebody because I was flailing a little and nobody at the theatre did anything about it. They didn't stop the DVD, they didn't attempt to resynch, they just let it run, so that all the really intense parts of the show, where you really want to get into it, the sound was coming before the lip movement.

Afterwards, we went over to a person to explain what happened and she just was like 'oh yeah, I heard that happened. Weird, huh? Sorry.' I thought we should have gotten some money back, especially considered the price we paid for the tickets.

My friend one time saw Star Wars: Episode One, where the...I'm blanking on the word...projector! Projector was misaimed and the movie was playing on the wall next to the screen. It took the projector people halfway through the movie to realize what was going on and fix it.

Anyway, go you with your mad movie rescuing skills!

[greedyskunk.livejournal.com]

And no one got up to complain? Were people that bored, er mesmerized by the movie?

[word-herder.livejournal.com]

GO CLEO! Awesome.

[gwynnywonk.livejournal.com]

I went to a showing yesterday with my sister (who genuinely if ashamedly loves the books). I timed it strategically so that there wouldn't be anyone else in the theatre, keeping in mind that I didn't want to be one of *those people*. There were only five other people in our screening. One was a middle-aged man who was there by himself (uhh...), two were twimoms without their kids, and the other two were a twentysomethings couple.

The couple gasped and groaned through the movie, and when Bella said "Irrevocably, and unconditionally loved him" or whatever twaddle, the guy said audibly,"FOR NO REASON! AUGH." I'd never actually heard someone say AUGH before.

My sister and I sat in the very back and tried not to die from poorly suppressed laughter. We still busted a silent gut every time Jasper, Alice or Emmett came on screen, because they were AWESOME. The only times we actually broke silence was in the ~RAY-BANS~ scene (AHAHAHAHAHAAAA), and during Bella's "dream" about Edward in her room (AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!). THOSE BRANCHES OUTSIDE HER WINDOW, THEY WERE MOVING. THEY WERE MOVING FROM SPEEDMO.

My sister came out of the movie and just went, "......dang, I really liked that. I didn't want to like it, but I did!" *look of despair* It probably only made it better that we read your m15m first.

Longpost is looong

[munchkin62.livejournal.com]

*hugs you*

Go rest - You have done so much.

[mckennl.livejournal.com]

Wow, I wish I could say I'd been to a showing of Twilight where the projector broke down and *cleolinda* fixed everything. That would be like, so meta.

[cleolinda.livejournal.com]

Hee. I actually kept wondering if there was anyone in there I knew (or e-knew). I mean, there's like three people in Alabama who actually read this journal, I'm sure, but one of them might have been in there! You don't know!

(I'm half expecting a comment even now that's all like "HOLY SHIT THAT WAS *YOU*?")