Why am I up at three in the morning?

[cleolinda]

All right, the Made of Fail podcast I did on Saturday is up. I haven't listened to it yet--I went to bed before it went up--so if I made an ass of myself, I'm blissfully unaware of it for the moment. All I know is, we started playing the Horrify the Twilight Noobs game (which is the best ever, and something you get to do once you've read the books: "No, he literally sparkles. It's not a metaphor. 'Like diamonds.' Have I told you about the vampire baseball?"), and I would lay something like "imprinting" or "suicide by public sparkling" on them, and I'd get this giant ". . ." in return. Like, three people, all stunned silent. And then they'd finally recollect themselves and go, "Okay... wait, let me get this straight..."

Also, copious amounts of Vitamin String Quartet.

(Wait, I was kind of embarrassed by when I first started talking--it was like, "Tell us about what you do," and somehow what fell out of my mouth was a flood of self-promotion. Which I guess was, technically, what was called for. I'm just... not used to saying things like that. For some reason, I have a feeling a lot of this listening experience for me is going to be, "... I can't believe I said that." OMG YOU GUYS THEIR REGULAR LISTENERS ARE GOING TO HATE ME)

Oh, and I haven't even told y'all the epic story of how alliancesjr went to stop the recording at the end and realized he'd lost his entire side of the Skype conference, and we all sat there trying to, like, wish the recording back into existence, and finally I saved him with my Google-fu ("data recovery Audacity crash"). And then he found it in his cache... in 1100 ten-second increments. I'm just saying, a lot of effort went into bringing this podcast to you.

OKAY WAIT I ALMOST FORGOT. If you go read the comments, they have a couple of pet anonytrolls over at made_of_fail_pc, and I am begging y'all not to engage them. I, for one, look forward to being told to DIAF, and you replying to the trolls does nothing but validate them. Don't defend me to someone who can't even put a name (a fake name, even! it's not that hard, really!) to their shit-stirring.

Comments

[mustang-bex1126.livejournal.com]

Lauren, you brilliant, brilliant woman! You worry so much about being perceived as a shameless narcissist that you should be certain in the fact that you are not. Now get your brilliant ass to bed! I should too, since I don't think that sentence makes any sense.

[spectralbovine.livejournal.com]

Hey! It's your voice! You sound like a person! Aw. You said "y'all"!

It's neat to hear you after all these years of reading you. Cool!

[cleolinda.livejournal.com]

Oh, did you miss the previous podcast I did a week or two ago? It's two hours of me being Southern. : )

[spectralbovine.livejournal.com]

You're very Southern!

[cleolinda.livejournal.com]

More Southern than I expected, even.

[spectralbovine.livejournal.com]

Are you a born-and-bred Alabaman? We moved to Texas before I started third grade, and people are always surprised that I don't have an accent.

[cleolinda.livejournal.com]

Yup, I've never lived anywhere but Birmingham. What I have is a city accent, which is a lot faster, less drawly, and closer to "standard" American than rural or small-town Southern.

[sneaky-minx.livejournal.com]

Insomnia club FTW!

[fiveforsilver]

we started playing the Horrify the Twilight Noobs game

Oh! Oh! I got to do that with my mom (fifth grade teacher, she wanted to know if she should have it in her room) and she was caught between groaning ("you're serious? you can't be serious!") and absolutely cracking up.

It was fabulous.

[cleolinda.livejournal.com]

It's the best game ever. And it's a proud tradition, because the first time I heard about the books, I sat there going, "They SPARKLE? BASEBALL? IMPRINTING? SCENT-MARKING??" And people would just keep shocking me over and over and it was like there was just this bottomless pit of WHAT? So once you've been the noob and then you read the books, you get to go out and continue the cycle.

Pleasant hearing you on the podcast

[mcamason.livejournal.com]

I've used your recaps to horrify my own friends about Twilight et sequelae for a little while now, and it's nice to be able to put a voice to the "voice" you write in,if that makes any sense.

Adore your daily linkspam, and enjoy your meta commentary a great deal.

-Matthew of the FL panhandle

[lots42.livejournal.com]

Nothing could be worse then the bit of Twilight I read where She-Woman freaks out because her hallucination of Mary Sue Grandma is going to meet her hallucination of Sparkly-Pants. After all, the two coolest people ever might not like each other or something. Especially since she's not sure if any of this is actually happening right at the moment.

[queenanthai.livejournal.com]

OMG YOU GUYS THEIR REGULAR LISTENERS ARE GOING TO HATE ME

Yes, our legions of tens of people. :)

Nahhhh, you were just fine. I love how you tried so hard to get across that you were actually a FAN of Twilight, but it was just "Wait, what the fuck?"

Thanks for guesting, and for saving Kevin from his own epic incompetenceOH HAI I LUV U KEVIN

[cleolinda.livejournal.com]

Heh, no problem.

I love how you tried so hard to get across that you were actually a FAN of Twilight, but it was just "Wait, what the fuck?"

I like living, really. It's good to be alive. It's not so good when the scary Twihard people come over and try to tear you to pieces. I AM TOTALLY A FAN, YOU GUYS. A FAN OF SOME KIND, FOR THE LOVE OF KITTENS.

[alliancesjr.livejournal.com]

*cry*

[padawansguide.livejournal.com]

Horrify the Twilight Noobs - I had no idea there was a name for this game! Because I've been doing this too, with some of my friends. "You didn't know that vampires sparkle??" So much fun!

I need to go listen your podcasts - it's been on my list to do!

[cleolinda.livejournal.com]

When I've had to do that listen-through each time to make sure I didn't make a complete ass of myself, I've just thrown it on in the background while I did something else. You know, check my email or RSS feeds or something. Because it's something like three hours of podcast when you put the two together.

[padawansguide.livejournal.com]

I like listening to them at work as background, so that should work fine! :-)

(Did I mention they sparkle?) ;-)

[greyduck.livejournal.com]

Hooray for mad Google-fu!

I try to explain to my coworkers, most of whom are Microsoft Certified Dingbats Or Whatever, that I'm not actually a gifted computer technician. What I am is a jolly good researcher. I probably don't know the answer, but my Google-fu will find me someone who does.

[madeline-may.livejournal.com]

If you go read the comments, they have a couple of pet anonytrolls over at made_of_fail_pc, and I am begging y'all not to engage them.

So, naturally, I went actively looking for them. And haven't found any yet. Curses!

I promise not to antagonize them.

(even though I really, really, really want to. WANT.)

EDIT: LOL FOUND THEM, AWESOMESAUCE.

Am I sick? Maybe.

[cleolinda.livejournal.com]

DO NOT WANT.

[madeline-may.livejournal.com]

*whispers* They... they call to me...

[saint-kat.livejournal.com]

It's nice to finally put the voice with the writing. Definitely can hear the bits and pieces of a Southern accent there. :)

Now if only you can post a pic of yourself, then the vision of you would be complete. Not that I'm asking it in a stalkerish manner or anything, of course.

[constancedh.livejournal.com]

XD I second the picture. In a not-at-all stalkerish way, of course.

[cleolinda.livejournal.com]

Unfortunately, I will not be posting pictures until I lose a lot more weight. A lot.

[mamapduck.livejournal.com]

I have now reached the point, solely because of your posts that I am going to have to read the Twilight books. [sigh]
So I guess this might be a good opportunity to tell you to DIAF!

Only, don't. Because the net would be less fun then.

[lacrimaeveneris.livejournal.com]

Wait... where's the other podcast? HOW DID I MISS THIS? ::woe::

Also, I'm blaming you for the fact that I can now be seen in public reading the Twilight books. :)

[cleolinda.livejournal.com]

Click the "podcasts" tag, it was only a week or so back.

[alliancesjr.livejournal.com]

Holy crap huge pimping post I love you.

IT WAS NOT MY FAULT I LOST IT. The Vista Greyscreen of Death claimed Audacity, and I nearly had a heart attack and thank you again so much for saving the day.

[cleolinda.livejournal.com]

Heh, no problem. You ought to have some folks visiting the comm, I would guess.

[alliancesjr.livejournal.com]

Quite a few, seriously.

I'm almost scared to see what today's listenership is when I log on tomorrow.

[cleolinda.livejournal.com]

Welcome to my life circa May 2004. ; )

[aliaspiral.livejournal.com]

I subbed at a middle school today, and thought of you when one cute 8th grader wandered by wearing a "Team Edward, Because Jacob Doesn't Sparkle" tshirt. I think I made her day by knowing what it was, too.

[cleolinda.livejournal.com]

Awww!

[elbales]

I, uh... went looking for the trolls because it's fun to point and laugh. *hangs head*

BUT I DID NOT FIND A ONE.

[blinkliz.livejournal.com]

Oh my god, I love it! You were awesome.

& The guy with the thick Southern accent cracks me up. "Slavics don't mess when it comes to vampire disposal." ♥

[blinkliz.livejournal.com]

"It's raining, it's raining in New Orleans; I am Jack's complete lack of surprise." Oh my god, Palahniuk references are crazy hot.

I hope you keep podcasting it up with this gang. They're hilarious!