The autumn of our discontent

[cleolinda]

My Launchcast station is on fire this morning--within 40 minutes it's played "More Than This," "Angel Eyes," and "Kiss Them for Me." Ooo! And here's the Killers. Awesome.

Other than my radio's taste in music, things have been pretty crappy around here. I mean, not in an angsty way, it's just--it's been the kind of week where I dropped a bowl full of leftovers, broke it, and then had to mop Mexican off 46% of the kitchen. Sister Girl, who is obsessive about seat belts and stop signs, managed to get a ticket the one day she didn't buckle up, because she was so upset about some boy, etc., etc. (fortunately, the ticket's only $10, but she's worried that she's getting close to having her license taken away because of many minor tickets). And then, of course, the Sonic Incident on Sunday.

(We did watch Batman Begins, though, and Mom seemed to be cheered up--she even pronounced it "the best Batman movie they've made, I guess." I had already seen it--opening week this past summer, actually. Now we're trying to watch the Episode III DVD half an hour at a time, every day when she comes home for lunch. And... she's not liking it so much. She spent the first installment asking, "What's this? Who are these people? Why is he shooting at his friend? Who are they rescuing? Which one is that? Well why is he just sitting there? Why is there noise in space? Why did he give R2D2 a cell phone? Why can't R2D2 just turn the cell phone off? Where did he get rocket boosters from? Why is Christopher Lee in this movie? Christopher Lee is still alive? Why didn't that kill Obi-Wan? Why is that robot coughing? Why are they still fighting? WHY DOES THIS NOT END?"

And this was before the ship's windows were broken and the entire cast was not killed instantly by the suffocating vortex of space.)

(Eeeeee, "November Rain"!)

Sister Girl is also at the doctor's today and I'm sure it's going to turn out badly and she'll be cranky when she gets home, because that's just the kind of week it's been. Meanwhile, I have got to get myself to the doctor, because the polycystic ovarian blahblahblah is getting ridiculous--I have short bursts of energy and then I have to lie down for a while. (There are other things that make the energy-sapping nature of the disorder clearer that I will not get into.) We're on the last book of the semester before we hit term paper time--Melville's Pierre, and I don't know how I'm going to get through this one. Dragfully, I guess. I've almost entirely despaired of ever catching up on Lost recaps, but I'll do it somehow.


Linkspam:

sigma7: "File under mildly hilarious -- since Slashdot found out that Blizzard's "Warden" World of Warcraft anti-cheat tool snoops on the user's computer looking for cheats/hacks, someone went for the best of both worlds and thwarted Warden using the Sony rootkit. Fun, but a little high on the geek factor, even for me. Oh, and apparently the rootkit phones home, too. And a school shooting in Tennessee. Been a while, hasn't it?"

Speaking of which: Motive Sought in Tenn. School Shooting.

Black t-shirts are in beta testing at CafePress. That's right: the day for white-on-black polar bear shirts has come.

PS2 Class Action Lawsuit.

Sony sued over rootkits; Italy kicks it off.

Pilfered parrot used to stuff bra, cops say.

U.S. Papers Pick Up Japanese-Style Comics.

Improper Desperate Housewives Conduct Exposed?

Whoa! I didn't even know Lindsay Lohan knew Jared Leto!

Omg waaaaant.

LJ user icons. Heh. "Wicked" and "Zaphod Beeblebrox" are pretty good, as well as the Nightcrawler Bamfs. Another classic set. Clearly I have to be cleolinda.


An update on the bad review from Amilyn:

I get Total Film and I've found in the past its book reviews to be so inept that I don't even glance at them anymore. If the book's not about Star Wars or LOTR, they never give it over three stars. You got two stars anyway. The piece on your book is brief and quite mean. It begins with "You know the Abridged Scripts that Total Film run?", which basically tells you the entire review consists of 'we've done this first, and better, so keep buying our magazine, oh dear God, please, everyone reads Empire instead, and we have children to feed!'.

It says the book's unoriginal and too long - "only 10 films are spoofed in a whopping 400 pages" - and that "the only thing you probably haven't come across before is the author's first name", which...what? Especially since the reviewer's first name is Ceri (Ser-ee? Kerr-ee? Pot?). That's really great intellectual journalism there, that is.

Wow. I had imagined it being... a lot less childish than that, somehow. I totally give them the "too long" point, though; that's always been a problem of mine regarding parodies, and it's come up before.

(And if they really have come across lightsaber recitals, vengeful dolphins, Cool Rider Galadriel and Shakespearean thugs before, you know, more power to them.)

It's that kind of week, you guys.




ETA: I'm wondering if someone can help me find a song. I have Sheryl Crow's "A Change Would Do You Good," no problem--but for years I've been trying to track down a live version she did on VH1. She's done it live many times, so I suspect that any live version would do. Help?

Comments

[arielchan.livejournal.com]

I'd just like to say that Texas, in a bid to further outlaw gay marriage yesterday, seems to have outlawed all marriage for lack of the word "other" after "any":

"(a) Marriage in this state shall consist only of the union of one man and one woman. (b) This state or a political subdivision of this state may not create or recognize any legal status identical or similar to marriage."

[cleolinda.livejournal.com]

Heeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. I heard about Texas in general, but hadn't realized they'd messed up like *that.*

[theonlykow.livejournal.com]

In short, fuck Total Film. I read the entire book in one sitting and thought the Teen Girl Squad reference was easily worth multiple times the price of admission. And then there was 399 pages more of amazing, delicious amazingness.

[cleolinda.livejournal.com]

Thanks. :) I'm struggling with the fact that I seem to be unable to let a bad review go, and I thought I was more mature than that. Woe.

[crystallia.livejournal.com]

I've read some of your spoofs before, and practically DIED laughing over them. Who cares if they're long? It just makes the enjoyment last longer. :-) Where and when can I buy your book?

[cleolinda.livejournal.com]

Amazon.co.uk's best place, at this point; it's going to be a while, possibly a year, before we can get it released over here. :/

[fxchip.livejournal.com]

Mmm, dirty laundry. (http://cgi.ebay.com/Best-Macintosh-M3571-POWERBOOK-14000CS-LAPTOP_W0QQitemZ8719156283QQcategoryZ4606QQrdZ1QQcmdZViewItem)

[koritsimou.livejournal.com]

Oh man, did this guy's stream-of-conciousness have no public filter?

[kokopellinelli]

Okay, I always get Jared Leto and Jared (it is Jared, right?) Leno mixed up, so until I was about halfway through that article, I was thinking, "Dude, he's WAY TOO OLD for her! And isn't he married? WTF?"

[lotusbiosm.livejournal.com]

It's Jay Leno. And the only thing they have in common is their initials and that they're famous.

[spooke.livejournal.com]

Your week is like "It's one of those days" by Weird Al. :( I hope it gets better.

[sigma7.livejournal.com]

Meh on the bad reviews. If "Ceri" is superficial enough to dog on a name, that tells me all I need to know about the depth of her (?) analysis. And, honestly..."too long" -- the hell? How is that a bad thing? Feh, I say.

Oh, and the EFF has a list of CDs with the Sony rootkit (http://www.eff.org/deeplinks/archives/004144.php). Subject to change, of course.

[coconut-zebra.livejournal.com]

Do you know if there's any way to make that usericon code apply to the actual username, as a permanant icon? Because I nearly died with joy when I saw Nightcrawler and Nightcrawler after Nightcrawler...

[cleolinda.livejournal.com]

I don't know--I think you have to code it into any mention of a username in an entry. I don't know if you could have it on your user info.

[koritsimou.livejournal.com]

I din't think your book was long at all, considering that it wasn't, in fact, 400 pages of regular text, but all out-liney and spced out with lots of headers and stuff, yeah?

Also, The LOST/LOTR crossover bit made my life.

Also, a review is their perception - and I find it difficult to trust a corporation's perception.

[corkdorkdan.livejournal.com]

I agree. The outline format makes it seem longer, but it's a very fast read. I wasn't expecting a one-page summary of each movie, cause that wouldn't be worth the money I paid for it. Some of them are over 3 hours long!

I dunno, I was sort of excited when I got a decent size book for my 12 pounds sterling.

Aside to Cleo: BTW, I think some of the best bits are the ones that randomly fly by with barely a mention, like Mace L. Windu. Or "upload a virus" comment in the JP review. LOL :-)

[vlexor.livejournal.com]

I didn't know Jared Leto and Lindsey Lohan knew each other either.

And it saddens me. (Also, did you see where he dated an Olsen twin?)

Your mom's questions RE: Star Wars ep. III made me laugh out loud at work, and I had to try to explain why to the person in the cubicle next to mine, but she had never seen the movie so she didn't understand. It led to awkward silence.

Sorry for the bad week. Only good vibes coming at you from this corner.

[delle.livejournal.com]

I adore your linkspam. Helps me waste more time! YAY!

And you are EVIL - EVIL!!!! - for that 1928 link. 'Cos I want that "Y" blue opal necklace in the worstestworst way.

Hope your day improves. And fuck Total Film. (Altho I'm right with you on the 'unable to give up on a bad comment' routine)

[la-sonnambula.livejournal.com]

"the best Batman movie they've made, I guess."

Hee! The "I guess" says so much.

Did you hear about this news (http://www.timesonline.co.uk/article/0,,3-1854972,00.html)? Yet another girl who did harm to her mother and blogs about it.

[koritsimou.livejournal.com]

Wow, that is really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, creepy.

[fiberaddict.livejournal.com]

The Star Wars questions? Soooooooooo funny - especially since my 5 year old can answer *every* *single* *one* *of* *them*. (The robot coughing? Comes from Clone Wars season 2 - Mace squished his trachea when he captured Palpatine. You probably already know that, but almost everyone ("normal" people) that have seen the movie have asked me about it.)

Am planning on breaking down and ordering from Amazon.uk on payday....I can't wait a year for the US version of your book! *eg*

[corkdorkdan.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I was all confused with I saw EpIII with the coughing robot. I'm not a diehard fan, so I figured I was just forgetting something from EpII (After all, I only suffered through it once) When I finally watched Clone Wars, it made a lot more sense, and I thought CW was pretty entertaining. I wish it would have been advertised better so I could have seen it beforehand. I seem to remember the Animatrix (which had a similar premise) getting heavily hyped before the two Matrix sequels came out.

Although I still don't get how a robot was able to use the power of the Force.

[angelic-oni.livejournal.com]

It says the book's unoriginal and too long - "only 10 films are spoofed in a whopping 400 pages" - and that "the only thing you probably haven't come across before is the author's first name"

*Blinks*
...Say what?
I don't understand the whole complaining about your name. (I mean, honestly, s/he's complaining about not knowing your name?!) Penname. Hello. Just... grr. Does anyone have a scan of this dumb review?

OK. So I have something to cheer you up, Cleo. Not sure if you've seen it before but...
http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-5409947201428088801&q=harry+potter
It is Harry Potter and the Hogwarts Dance Team. Wait for the dancing Malfoy. Nightmare inducing but hilarious.

Also. Lost tonight. Yay.

[sarah531.livejournal.com]

I'm still considering sending Total Film an email- nothing rude, just in the hope that they'll print it and people will see that reviews can be wrongdammit. XD But I figured I'd better ask first- so consider this asking. ;)

[cleolinda.livejournal.com]

Hmm. I can't figure out if that'd be a good idea or not. I mean, on one hand, I hate reading letters sections where a bunch of fans write in going, "OMG YOU ARE SO WRONG! [WHATEVER] IS SO GOOD AND YOU ARE STUPID!" On the other hand, what I've seen of the review is pretty biased, maybe even unprofessional, so... I don't know.

[jedilora.livejournal.com]

Feeling the PCOS exhaustion. I've been up nearly every night until six, simply because I'm not tired until around then, despite lying in bed awake since one, and then BAM. Sleep for a day.

[cleolinda.livejournal.com]

Man, you too?

[christwise.livejournal.com]

Woe, polycystic ovarian tiredcakes? Stop me if this is a touchy subject but, uh, me too. They think. Well, the doctors would know if the secretary weren't a total nimrod.

Case in point: "I'm a student, I have class on Tuesdays and Thursdays. Do you have anything open on Wednesday?"
"How does Thursday the 17th sound?"

And so on.

Oh, and Empire rules(and so must be better than Total Film). I'm in Boston but I still shell out the $9.99 for it. I haven't seen a review of your book in this month's edition. Anyway, just remember that the Wizard of Oz, Lord or the Rings, and Citizen Kane have all been badly reviewed.

[cleolinda.livejournal.com]

Since you do get Empire (and honestly, I always used their site as one of my sources back when I did a movie news site), do keep an eye on the book section for me. I was curious to see if they'd review it, and what they'd have to say.

Various things

[particle-person.livejournal.com]

Sorry to hear about the crappy week. Maybe it will get better soon? Anyhow, I have some music for you that I'll link later-- not the thing you asked for, something else. I hope it provides your new sig line.

Linkspam:

A list of CDs (not necessarily a COMPLETE list, just a list) affected with the rootkit disease and similar:
http://www.fatchuck.com/z3.html

A really great essay by Ursula Vernon on why NaNoWriMo is like throwing pots, and how quantity can be a virtue:
http://www.livejournal.com/users/ursulav/406505.html

Then you take it out to the dumpster, and you dither for about thirty seconds, and your chest feels tight, and finally you grit your teeth and take the very worst one, the one that looks like a dog turd with a lid, and you wind up and you pitch it into the half-empty dumpster and you listen to it smash and something happens in your head that falls about halfway between a cry of anguish and an orgasm. And you pick up the next one and smash it, and the next one, and the next one, and by the end you're grinning like an idiot and you feel as clean and sleek and hollow as a Hamada tea bowl.

[mouseykins1.livejournal.com]

Lucky! My launchcast has been an ass lately. It keeps giving me all of this metal crap and rap that 'is recommended by yahoo'.

[cleolinda.livejournal.com]

Have you tried putting a low rating on that entire genre, or rating the individual songs/artists "never play this again"? I found that that straightened things out pretty quickly on mine.

[deliciouspear.livejournal.com]

"Other than my radio's taste in music, things have been pretty crappy around here."


Amen to THAT.

The radio is rocking my world though. The DJ seems to be on an 80s kick, which I am all for.

Everything else is pretty asstastic.

[shesnotallthere.livejournal.com]

Sorry it's been such a crap week. I hope you get to feeling better. :o)

[lucky-ladybug.livejournal.com]

Ok so I'm a lurker - but I've been watching for awhile on a friend's friend list and generally love you. (love the hunger site reminders, love 15 minutes, especially phantom of the opera, etc.)

But I *had* to post when you mentioned you had PCOD. I've recently been diagnosed with it and don't know a whole lot about it other than it gives you problems and can make it hard to have babies (the least of my concerns currently). Do you know of some repository of knowledge on the subject or feel like chatting about your experience with it? It would be such a help. Thanks.

[cleolinda.livejournal.com]

I've really gotten off pretty light with it--no cysts, not much pain. Just a hideously irregular and protracted cycle that leaves me pretty worn out. I'm also hearing that it interferes with the way your body processes sugar, so if you already have any diabetic tendencies (it runs in my family), it can be a problem there, too. You might want to try

http://dir.yahoo.com/Health/Diseases_and_Conditions/Polycystic_Ovarian_Syndrome__PCOS_/

and

http://www.pcosupport.org/.

There are a ton of people who read this journal who have it, though--I heard that it's really common, something like 20% of women? It was either 20% or 25%. And every time I mention it, at least a few more fellow sufferers pop up as well.

[foresthouse.livejournal.com]

I once had someone spill an entire beer on my kitchen floor - talk about hard to clean...

I'm still doing LOST recaps, and you can feel free to direct people there if you find you don't have time to catch up (not surprising what with the book and all!) although I'll be the first to admit they aren't as great as yours :)

Did you see the Pierce Brosnan bit under the Lohan news? SO. FUNNY.

Although I haven't read the book yet, I say the more parody, the better. 400 pages? COOL.

[yarha.livejournal.com]

... and foresthouse's Lost recaps are hysterical, too. Just sayin'.

Yarha, Like Visa/Mastercard: Giving Credit Where Credit is Due

[notashamed.livejournal.com]

For future linkspams, possibly?
new Lost-inspired t-shirt (http://www.glarkware.com/securestore/c188252p16735585.2.html)

[ambiguousreason.livejournal.com]

"only 10 films are spoofed in a whopping 400 pages"

First, who cares if it's long? It's not like every page is covered in 8-point text, either. It's all spaced out, and there are tons of headers, etc. Second, LOTR is treated as three separate movies, so it's really more like 12 films, which is only about 33 pages apiece.

I can totally relate about not being able to let negative comments go, but seriously, this reviewer sounds so immature and unprofessional (she complains about your name? The fuck?) that I would really try to not let it bother me.

[cleolinda.livejournal.com]

See, I think that's why it *does* bother me. Although I guess we won't know what my comparative letting-go skills are like until I do get a professional, unbiased review. I do think it's shitty to start the review off with the whole "You know our parodies?" thing. Like I've ever read Total Film in my life or something.