Snow: let me explain it

[cleolinda]

The thing you have to understand about snow panic in Alabama is that it's not about the snow. Mostly, it's about us not being prepared for snow; a meager two inches is considered an epic blizzard. It's also about the side effects of snow--I live in a heavily-wooded suburban area full of giant, beautiful, old trees. Very old trees. And they all have dead branches here and there hanging on by a shred of bark, so when you have just enough snow to weigh them down, they break off and fall onto the power lines. Or worse, the entire tree is mostly dead and it falls across the road or onto (and usually through) your house. There was one Epic Two-Inch Snow that ended up with a three-foot-thick, forty-foot-long pine lying across our street (and in what used to be someone's sun room), while live power lines were sparking in the road. In fact, my mother reported last night that, as she was driving home, she saw a number of official-looking trucks on the side of the road, presumably stationed for speedy tree removal.

It's also about the ice. None of us know how to drive on it, because we don't get it often enough to figure out how and then retain that knowledge. One time there was a Special News Report on Safe Winter Weather Driving, and I am serious, it was, in its entirety, "Drive slow." And now, over to Jim with the sports! So basically, entire schools, businesses, and highways will be shut down for safety reasons while all of Chicago points and laughs. I am not even kidding: my sister may not be able to get to work on Friday--

Oh God. I just realized that if we are all iced in together for the next four days, a remake of The Shining is going to break out.


While we're here, a teensy bit of Twi-spam, because I am getting a lot of email about this, and also, I enjoy the progression of the headlines:

Attn. Jackson Rathbone: Missing something?

'Eclipse' Script Wasn't Leaked, Says Summit. 

Nikki Finke: Yes, That Leaked Movie Script Is 'Eclipse.' 

1. I don't want to read it. I'm to a point where I don't even watch clips of movies I know I want to see anymore. I get so bored in the theater if I feel like I've already seen the movie. 2. I suspect the wink emoticon in the script (as seen at the first link) is forced product-placement sarcasm from screenwriter Melissa Rosenberg. 3. My dazzle is somewhat chagrined that (people tell me) the werewolf-vampire nose-fist bump is not in this version of the script, because, quite honestly, the Edward/Seth stuff is the only thing I find remotely likeable about Book!Edward. Also: COME ON! WEREWOLF-VAMPIRE NOSE-FIST BUMP! If there is anything funnier than that, I can't think of it right now.

Meanwhile, I am trying to work--I got a good bit of novel note-sorting and categorizing done yesterday--but am having a hell of a time. Lots of interruptions, and I can't concentrate for shit. Also, my new calendars (50% off!) came in from Amazon yesterday, but without the books I had bought for research, and then I realized I had forgotten to order a couple of other researchy things anyway, fnarr. Also-also, I bought another pair of fingerless gloves because I was concerned that my homemade recycled ones were fraying a bit from being worn so much, and I am really hoping they arrive before the cold snap is over. This is Alabama, after all.


OH OH OH I ALMOST FORGOT I have two questions to ask you:

1) How do we get e-books from my stepfather's Kindle onto my parents' computer? They can't figure out how.

2) Those identity protection/theft-prevention services, are any of them actually any good?

Comments

[nanet.livejournal.com]

Where I work, we're expected to brave the snow and get in and take pictures of the campus covered in the white stuff. Because it doesn't often snow in Tennessee. So we go into snow panic. And I have to drive in it. And trudge through it. So the school can have pictures for Christmas cards.

[bibliotech.livejournal.com]

Re: Kindle: hook it up via the USB cable, and it should show up as a separate device. The books are all in the 'documents' folder.

[rhoda-rants.livejournal.com]

LOL--oops.



I just hope, if that was Jacksper's doing, they don't send him the way of Rachelle LeFevre, because I will throw an epic shit fit if that happens.

[anthemyst.livejournal.com]

If you hook the Kindle to the computer via USB port, you should be able to look at all the files stored on the Kindle and just drag and drop them onto the desktop or wherever.

[kittybacklash.livejournal.com]

Well, we get snow in the British Isles most years, and we still have snow panic. Every year. We are constantly surprised that snow happens and therefore there is year after year of chaos and panic because...well I don't know quite why.

It's less understandable than Alabama Snow Panic, and even more point-and-laugh worthy. -sigh-

[xturtle.livejournal.com]

I live in Minnesota, where nothing closes unless the governor closes it, and he's busy planning his run for president. We're supposed to have -35 windchills tomorrow, which will result in... a colder commute.

[barrelgoddess.livejournal.com]

LMAO. Though, what surprises me about it is that it wasn't Pattinson's copy. I'd expect that from him at this point...

[acaciakitty.livejournal.com]

Hey hey hey, East Tennessee girl checking in! I KNOW about what snow does to us Southern people who don't know how to deal with it. Hell if the roads are icy I won't leave the house. I hit a patch one time, driving home from work in a snow storm, and I thought my life was going to end right then.

Also hilarious is the crazy rush to the grocery store when omg!snow is coming. People stock up like we're all going into underground bunkers for 10 years.

Which reminds me that I need to get a gallon of milk...

[mokeyhokey.livejournal.com]

I assure you: nobody in Chicago knows how to drive in the snow either.

(Okay that's not completely truthful, but you'd think everyone was brainswapped with people from Alabama every year when it snows for the first time.)

[vampirejen.livejournal.com]

Snooooooow! I'm in Pa where it snows alot, and believe me snow panic hits each and every time, no matter how "prepared" the cities think they are. And, even getting practice driving in/on ice doesn't help people. I refuse to drive on icy streets if I don't absolutely have to. I also refuse to be caught in a grocery store the day before, day of, first day out after a snowstorm. People think they need to stock/restock for the end of the world. Its funny, but annoying.

[darth-snarky.livejournal.com]

I'm currently in Minnesota, too, and today it felt warmer. I checked the temperature, and that's because it got all the way to 0! WHOOHOO!

Though to be fair, we can't really have any snow-related closures when it's too cold to snow.

[caersidi.livejournal.com]

I so agree about the preparedness. We don't get snow that often in England for us to be geared up for it or again to know how to drive on icy roads.

In Canada where I grew up we had snow tires and drivers gained the knowledge of how to negotiate in all kinds of snow and ice.

ha. hahah. hahahah.

[ohsnapcat.livejournal.com]

oh... and in case you haven't seen this...
http://www.examiner.com/x-4908-Twilight-Examiner~y2010m1d6-Finally-a-sparkly-Edward-Twilight-doll

i mean, really?!?!?! like every girl who owns their very own sparklepire has not "enhanced" it already?!?!? hahaha...

[randomizemylife.livejournal.com]

Thank God I'm not the only one who's chagrined that the nose-fist-bump is missing. I was unexpectedly touched by that in the book (...actually, it might have been the only thing in the book I actually liked, lol). Screenwriters, what are you thinking?

[maudelynn.livejournal.com]

It's his revenge for the atrocious wigs they keep putting him in.

I like him best, too.

[mazarin221b.livejournal.com]

Oh Jackson, you poor bastard. I really hope that is a fake. Here in Indy we're expecting about 5 to 8 inches from tonight through Friday, and people are already planning to skip work tomorrow. Jeez, people. Now, if I can't get out of my driveway by Friday AM, then yeah, I'l call in. But preemptive vacation is a bit of a stretch, even for me, and I'm a big wuss about snow.

[maudelynn.livejournal.com]

I am going downtown tomorrow, getting tipsy and finally seeing New Moon. I am only going to be there for belated moral support and the Rathbone.

[flameraven.livejournal.com]

I think this is more because people in Chicago drive like maniacs as a default state, and then they try to apply that to snowy conditions.

Seriously. I grew up 20 miles outside the city, but I will NEVER drive in Chicago unless absolutely pressed to. I'd much rather take the South Shore in and then use the trolleys to get around downtown. D:

Mind you, the Chicago pedestrians don't believe in crossing at the lights, either (and I'm guilty of this too) which I'm sure doesn't help.

[flameraven.livejournal.com]

Having grown up near Chicago, yes, I point and laugh. Mind you, Indianapolis (where I now live) is not much better; I've seen the city shut down over 8" of snow before. Although this seems to be because Indy does not actually have a lot of money set aside for plows and salt trucks, and so they like to wait until AFTER the snow is done to send them out. Which means anyone trying to drive home will be in for a long, long wait. D:

We're supposed to get 3-6" here over the next few days, but thankfully, I don't have to go anywhere.

[schmoo999.livejournal.com]

I live in the snow belt region of NE Ohio and plenty of people get snow panic. We were having a snow storm the other night when I went to see Sherlock Holmes, now I also have traction drive on my mini van that I adore during winter but there are always people who drive at a crawl on the interstate.

But we do have to keep the dead branches off trees and every summer you see trucks around trimming those off. :)

[onceinspired.livejournal.com]

Ohio points and laughs at you. Especially the Cleveland area because that lake-effect snow is a bitch. We love you anyway. :D

[xturtle.livejournal.com]

There was one day when I was in high school when the governor finally said, wait, students shouldn't be waiting for buses in -65 degree windchills. I worry much less about snow, and much more able cold.

[akamarykate.livejournal.com]

I can totally understand southern snow panic. If you don't have the equipment to deal with it, even a little snow can create havoc.

Here in Omaha, we're currently getting more snow, going on 30" in the past 3 weeks or so (and tonight we get 30mph winds! High on Friday *without* factoring in wind chill of -8!). Even for Nebraska, this is unusual, and it's dangerous to drive through, or turn at, any intersection because the snow's piled so high no one can see what's coming. There's a square city block lot near me where they're trying to move some of the excess stuff, and it's half full of snow piles 10-15 feet high. Craziness.

I re-read The Long Winter last night on the theory that reading about the Ingalls family twisting hay for fuel and freeze drying their clothes would make our own winter easier to deal with. But it didn't help nearly as much as a plane ticket to San Diego would.

[salamandersam.livejournal.com]

The state of Louisiana is currently gearing up for possible sleet and snow tomorrow. It snowed last year, it's not supposed to snow two years in a row! And everything shuts down here. I've already informed my boss if the roads are bad enough (icy or sleety or snowy), then I'm not coming into work tomorrow. I'm just not willing to drive two hours one way on icy roads.

[cat-eyed-fox.livejournal.com]

To be fair, here in South Dakota, where we do get snow regularly, and occasionally very very deep, once that first snow shows up be in it October or November people freak their shit out.
I'm talking cars fishtailing, snow plows burying cars b/c people forget to move them off the street after a big snow, people suffering from frostbite b/c they didn't think to put on snowpants to get their mail in -20 degree weather ("I was just gettin my Netflix an' then next thing I know I canna feel my fingers! An' they're turnin' black.") and bunches of accidents b/c again, we've forgotten to OMG not drive like morons. Alabama might not get as much snow as other places but the epic "Whoops not ready yet. How about you snow next week?" mentality is everywhere.