omg what

[cleolinda]

Hey guys, let's play a game! It's called "What the SHIT Is This THING I Found Growing In Our Camellias?" It's over three feet tall, "make a circle with your thumb and index finger" thick at the bottom of the stem, and it came out of NOWHERE. Seriously, I went outside and it was just THERE, it might have sprung up overnight, I don't even know. What the hell is it?

ETA: Hm. I'm liking pokeweed as an ID. Apparently it's a bitch to kill (like most random plants that spring up out of nowhere)--we've never had it before, though, which means that we are now INFECTED with it. Alas.

Comments

[raynala.livejournal.com]

Audrey II!

[glenvorian.livejournal.com]

*dies laughing*

FEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEED MEEEEEEEEEEEE!

[kijikun.livejournal.com]

Well we can rule out Audrey.

[annlarimer.livejournal.com]

You don't have to worry until the little faces start popping out.

[laughingacademy.livejournal.com]

Triffid. Careful! They spit.

[bleedingspade.livejournal.com]

I swear I'm the only one who may have gotten that joke.

[queenanthai.livejournal.com]

Clearly, Poison Ivy is to blame. Alert Batman.

[laughingacademy.livejournal.com]

Omigod. Iconlove! May I swipe? Will credit.

[leiabelle.livejournal.com]

I don't have an answer, but you could take or e-mail the photo to your county Extension office (http://www.aces.edu/counties/Jefferson/). A horticulture agent or Master Gardener should be able to identify it. :)

[raynala.livejournal.com]

oh, sure, a serious answer... be helpful, why don't you.

[herdivineshadow]

OMG GIANT BEANSTALK


Whatever you do, do not let the singing harp blab on you.

[glenvorian.livejournal.com]

That would be AWESOME.

[particle-person.livejournal.com]

GOOD GOD. You might need a flame thrower. What the FUCK is going down in Alabama? This is what happens when your backyard starts mainlining CO₂, man.

[cleolinda.livejournal.com]

I really hope another scarlet whatthefuck shows up--every now and then we get this bright red spiky flower show up on the lawn out of nowhere. We used to get them at my old house as well. So weird. But if it came back, I could take a picture and y'all could help me identify it!

[willow-25.livejournal.com]

I forget what those are called, but they are nasty and hard to get rid of. On the a-little-bit-positive side (depending on how you look at it) native americans used the berries that will grow on it in the fall (they're red) to make a diuretic tea that they believe had hallucinogenic properties (ie helped them connect to the spirit world).

If only I could remember the name of the damn plant...

[cleolinda.livejournal.com]

My parents actually found, and I quote, "about twenty of those" in my grandmother's yard when they were doing a massive spring trim-up for her. And we've already got two others springing up in *our* backyard. We might need to do something aobut this, yeah.

[notashamed.livejournal.com]

i think i have one of those growing in front of my patio. I cut it down every year and it GROWS BACK EVERY YEAR.

[quietselkie.livejournal.com]

I think it's called a beautyberry bush. (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Beauty_berry) Here are a couple of image links that may help, but you'd have to wait for late summer to see the fruits:
http://hankinslawrenceimages.wordpress.com/2008/10/22/issai-beautyberry-callicarpa-dichotoma-issai/
http://www.flickr.com/photos/jusfi/1386765601/

I grew up in NW Florida, and we had these all over. Fast growing cane sort of plants.

[cleolinda.livejournal.com]

Hm. You know, I was going to compare the stem to a sugarcane, actually.

[divadeanna.livejournal.com]

Uh oh. Did one of the dolls sell one of TLE's ponies for magic beans?

[jasonbeast.livejournal.com]

Chinaberry? (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chinaberry) They grow hella fast and are a bitch to get rid of.

[mermaidkween.livejournal.com]

I have no idea what it is, but we also had one in our backyard. We would pull it up, and it would look like the roots came with it, but within a week it was like, five feet tall again! We finally just let the damn thing grow, and the stem turned into something like WOOD. What the hell. Also, after we just let it grow, it ended up being taller than our two-story house.

Yeah.

[pen37.livejournal.com]

Looks like it might be poke salad. My grandmother used to serve it at dinner, but I thought it was disgusting.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pokeweed
http://waynesword.palomar.edu/ecoph24.htm

[silverusagi]

Yes, poke salad! My grandma used to eat it, too!

[pennyverse.livejournal.com]

My parents' backyard (in VA) gets those sometimes - giant weedy things, forget what they're called (maybe pokeweed, although I just Wiki'd that and it doesn't seem quite right). Anyway, yeah, one day you look in the back and it's normal and the next HOLY SHIT GIANT GREEN THINGS EVERYWHERE.

[ginmar.livejournal.com]

Have you checked under your bed for pods?

[intrikate88.livejournal.com]

I'm right next to you in Georgia, and I get that shit in my garden too... no idea what it is, but the root clump is usually a horizontally growing single root very close to the surface. They grow a couple feet a day and if you let them get too big you'll wrench your back pulling it, but they're not too hard to get rid of.

Oh, wait, you wanted to know what it WAS? ...I'm bad at this game. I say we play the game Rip Shit Up.

[hobbitomm.livejournal.com]

I'm voting Triffid.

[guinevere33.livejournal.com]

Yup, that is most definitely pokeweed. (I grew up in Tuscaloosa; we definitely had some in the deeper recesses of the yard.) It has a red/fuchsia stem and will eventually generate dark purple berries (almost black). Birds really like eating said berries and then pooping purple grossness all over your car. I suspect the birds are the reason pokeweed's so hard to get rid of - they poop the seeds EVERYWHERE.

[cleolinda.livejournal.com]

Well, an aerial drop would explain how the plant got in through a high privacy fence--I wouldn't have thought wind alone could carry it in.

[barrelgoddess.livejournal.com]

Completely off-topic, but I have something to add to the next linkspam/the Lostnesday post: Ace of Cakes Lost Cake episode! (http://www.foodnetwork.com/ace-of-cakes/lost-in-hawaii/index.html) Airing this Saturday night, and there's a preview vid on the Ace of Cakes index page. It looks pretty awesome~

[glenvorian.livejournal.com]

Ace of Cakes is one of the best shows ever.

[coconut-dragon.livejournal.com]

That reminds me of the time I went out to water my plants and I saw a strange plant growing out near the side of the house. I took a closer look and found out it was a fake plant. Growing in my yard.

Anyway, it'd be cool if your plant was like, the Bean of the Stars or something.

[cleolinda.livejournal.com]

Wait, it was... what? How?

[cmdr-zoom.livejournal.com]

Pokeweed: O HAI

IM IN UR GARDENZ
KILLN UR PLANTZ

Plant mystery du jour

[suzeclues12.livejournal.com]

1) Anything you don't want is a weed (regardless of what it ACTUALLY is identified as). Don't be shy of pulling it up by the roots.

2) Chop off a leaf and go to the plant section of your nearest Lowe's/Home Depot/Nursery of good repute. Throw yourself at their mercy in regards to identification and - if you so decide - disposal. Proceed with caution (says the woman who was hospitalized due to poison ivy/oak exposure).

[crucioveritas.livejournal.com]

Is TLE missing any ponies? I smell the work of a gypsy and a pirate..