Tuesday night, zzzzzzz

[cleolinda]

Hmm. I can't say exactly how much I got done today, since it was in scattershot places, but it was somewhere in the neighborhood of 2000-2500 words, so: good times. I'm actually feeling really wiped out this week, which either means that I'm fighting off some kind of incipient cold or it's a hormonal thing--I have tons of laundry to do and trash to take out, and it's all I can do to peck away at the laptop. (Upside: Sci-Fi was running a small X-Files marathon today, including "Bad Blood," "The Post-Modern Prometheus," "Home," and a Doggett-Reyes episode that I pointedly ignored. It was one of my better days for background television.)

Meanwhile, my mother, bless her heart (and I mean that sincerely, not in a Southern Snark way) is driving me crazy. And I think part of what's driving me crazy is that I understand where she's coming from, but I don't know how to measure or communicate what she wants to know. What happens is that she comes home every day and asks me how far along on Black Ribbon I am, even though I have told her that I don't know and that I have no way of knowing. I can tell her how many words and/or pages it currently is, but I cannot say how long it will be when it's done, and I can't be entirely sure how many scenes are lacking, as I'm at a point where I'm making up a lot of expansion as I go along. This just how I work, honestly, and part of the reason academic papers give me hives is that I literally do not know when they'll be done until the moment I go, "Hey! That last paragraph was pretty much it! There's nothing left to do! It's done!" A lot of this has to do with the fact that I work out of order. I can't help it; it's the way I think. And it kills me because I know that she's always believed in me as writer, even when I was five years old and writing "books" in crayon. My family has been supporting me financially because they believe in me, and I think we're all kind of looking at this as The Project That Makes Me Financially Independent. Of them, I mean; not independent of working at all. So I understand why she wants to know. But I've told her my goal is to finish this by my birthday, which is in almost exactly two months, so you'd think that'd give her a time frame, right? But today I'm like, "Today wasn't quite as good as yesterday, but it was still 2000-2500 words or so," and she says (hopefully!), "So is it almost finished?" Is it almost... is it... IS IT ALMOST FINISHED? ARE YOU SHITTING ME? And she keeps asking if I can give her a percentage ("Is it 80% done?" The only thing harder than saying "I don't know" is "Well, I do know it's hardly that done"), and I can't. I don't know. I feel like I'm on top of things, but "things" can't be quantified at the moment. I'm thisclose to making a frickin' bar graph of all twenty chapters showing approximately how much may or may not be done, except that I'm afraid imaginary numbers may be involved ("Chapter 7 = 3a x [15b +4c] - 54i"). I want to tell her what she wants to know, and I understand why she wants to know it, but I don't know how to express the answer in numbers, dammit!

Anyway, I am deeply of the tired, so I have only a tiny spot of linkspam for you today:

For those of you who have read Erik Larson's Thunderstruck: Notorious Dr Crippen wrongly hanged, scientists say. "But they concede that other evidence clearly shows that the body could only have made its way to Crippen's house when he and his [allegedly murdered] wife were living there." To be honest, I had wondered why Crippen would poison and mutilate his wife.

Chocolatier resigns after "extraordinary act of truffle-squishing" in a rival store.

Hey! It's a new Crap Email From A Dude! "You Have Destroyed True Love."

Time Bandits map reproduction.

Entertainment Weekly previews Alan Moore's League of Extraordinary Gentlemen: Black Dossier. Whee!

Dumbledore is "Machiavellian," and Snape "Vindictive" Says J.K. Rowling, handles rogue bra with aplomb.

Tim Burton to Speak in NYC & Sweeney Todd Press Days Set.

A filmgoer’s guide to bad sex with Christian Bale.

Comments

[particle-person.livejournal.com]

To be honest, I had wondered why Crippen would poison and mutilate his wife.

From the Three Minute Hamlet:

Then Hamlet's mommy drank the wine and as her face turned blue,
Hamlet said, "I think this king's a baddie through and through."
"Incestuous, murderous, damned Dane," he said, to be precise,
Then made up for hesitating once, by killing Claudius twice.
He stabbed him with his knife and forced the wine between his lips
He said, "The rest is silence," and he cashed in all his chips.
They fired a volley over him that shook the topmost rafter,
And Fortinbras, knee deep in Danes, lived happily ever after.

--
I have trouble with my parents asking me when I'm going to graduate all the time. ("I don't know! When I'm done with all the research and all the writing!")

[msilverstar]

Time Bandits map! I know what I want for ChristmaKwanakahhh what my little brother used to call "Gift Giving Season".

[kosher-jenny.livejournal.com]

That Bale thing is hilarious. I love the Batman Begins bit.

I'm excited as hell about Black Dossier, but man that preview is crappily formated. Horrid flash viewer and instead of actually zooming in so you can read the tiny text bubbles it give you a pixelated "magnifying glass" view instead. Bleh.

[justjayj.livejournal.com]

"So is it almost finished?"

Gaaaaah! Why do they do this? I'm in a revision marathon myself, and I can't tell you how often I've had to answer this question in the past month. They mean well, but...I keep wanting to ask, "So, CEO yet?" "So, pregnant yet?" "So, lost 20 lbs. yet?" and so forth, as appropriate.

[elbales]

Here, this linkspam will make your jaw drop.

NYC bride is suing her wedding florist for $400K. Why? Because... the hydrangeas were the wrong color. Well, she says they were wilted, too. And in dirty vases without water.

She's really reaching here, isn't she? Jebus. Why can't she just demand a refund like a normal pers--oh. She's a lawyer.

NEVER MIND.

[x-knees.livejournal.com]

The X-Files is always a good day for background TV. Bad Blood especially.

[demonqueen666.livejournal.com]

Is "Bad Blood" the one with the yokel vampire town where they tell the story twice from their different POVs?? Because that's the one I love like cake.

League of Extraordinary Acts of Truffle Squishing

[ninepointfivemm.livejournal.com]

The linkspam was short but very definitely awesome. I am still giggling over the Extraordinary Act of Truffle-Squishing, Bad Sex With Christian Bale, and The Crap Email From a Film Student Jerk (Which Explains Everything).

You linkspam has made me imagine Christian Bale, as Patrick Bateman, squishing truffles.

Also, my mom does that thing like, "ARE YOU DONE YET" when I'm doing papers. It's very frustrating, because I have all the information, but I'm terrible at outlining. So I have to piece together all of my highlighting and information in a coherent matter without sounding stupid, and the, "JESSSSS, ARE YOU DONE WITH YOUR PAPER YET" doesn't seem to help. Hmm.

"Is it done yet?"

[rclementmoore.livejournal.com]

My mother asks me that, too. I figure it's payback for all those family vacations and the "Are we there yet?" hell that my brother and I put her through.

I try and train the family that, if they must aks, "How's it going?" is a better question. It allows for an affirmative answer if the day has gone well. "Is it done yet?" allows only for a negative, even if you've been productive.

[elbales]

p.s. Crap E-mail: Ye gods. Do they give degrees in Histrionics?

[lesamalie.livejournal.com]

When my sister and I were kids, and we went on road trips (and we went on MANY MANY road trips in our VW van), we would always ask my dad "how much further?" and he would just make up a number "62 miles" or "47 minutes" because to our mind, we just wanted an answer--something to know that we are progressing. Neither of us understood that he was mocking us, though I'm sure we wondering why my mom always hit my dad in the arm whenever he did it.

Regardless, maybe its time to just tell her something. I totally understand in the not-knowing-when-its-done department. And its horrible lying to your mom, but sometimes it the best way to stop people asking.

[particle-person.livejournal.com]

My dad would look at the clock and say, "Six minutes and thirty five seconds since the last time you asked." Often, though, he'd just tell us. My dad has an uncanny ability to guess trip times almost to the minute. (He did actually achieve to-the-minute accuracy on one trip, and I think he was as surprised as the rest of us.)

[mandie-rw.livejournal.com]

The Christian Bale article made me giggle. A lot.

[edda.livejournal.com]

Draw your mom and elaborate chart like you said, with an even more elaborate key to decode it, and then wander off and shut yourself in your room. S'worth a try.

Also?:

bad sex with Christian Bale

I refuse to believe this is possible. *sticks fingers in ears* LALALALALA.

[cleolinda.livejournal.com]

Me too! And Luke Wilson as the sheriff! It may actually be my favorite episode ever, I'm not sure.

(They actually showed the ep in your icon, too--the Stephen King demon doll one. At least, I know they showed that one, and I know Mulder was busy sharpening pencils at some point during the day.)

[leucocrystal]

Yes, it is! SO much love for that episode. Oh, the hilarity. (Love the icon, too! Oh, Mulder.)

[cindyg.livejournal.com]

Is that the one where the "Shaft" theme makes an appearance, and Scully starts craving for pizza in the middle of her autopsy?

I'm almost sure it is - Bad Blood is a classic X-File episode!

[artemis-archer.livejournal.com]

lol rogue bra, sometimes they just won't behave

[eofs.livejournal.com]

Presumably the chocolatier did that because he knew Thornton's can't even hope to compete with Hotel Chocolat on quality/range, and frankly aren't that much cheaper either.

(I'm also a bit confused because I know precisely that Hotel Chocolat and I can't quite reconcile the description of his actions with the shop's layout.)

[cleolinda.livejournal.com]

That's the one! I love how shocked Mulder is when she recounts that part of the story, too--"I did not!"

[angelan.livejournal.com]

My parents used to give us the speed and the distance, and then make us work it out. I still do that in my head on long trips.

[londonsparrow.livejournal.com]

I love (and agree with) the first comment in the Christian Bale link, re: The Prestige. Because... TWINS. Ahem.

Sadly, I can't offer any advice on the writing progress front, because I never finish anything (fiction-wise), so nobody really expects me to anymore. Better luck to you!

[yarha.livejournal.com]

The novel isn't over until the fat paycheck sings. Or something.

Yarha, The Pay's the Thing Wherein I'll Catch the Conscience of the King

x-files

[glyphs.livejournal.com]

I have to say that's one of the things that sucks about not having cable...no x-files reruns and I can't afford to buy the seasons in my current financial situation. :( Bad Blood & Post-Modern Prometheus are two of my favorite episodes...along with Jose Chung's From Outer Space.

[falco-conlon.livejournal.com]

I have to disagree with Batman. C'mon. Batman? Sex with Batman. That shit would own.

In re: the mom

[rorqual.livejournal.com]

Have you actually told your mom the general outline of the book (or is it something you're not comfortable doing, which is totally understandable)? If you did, though, then maybe you could break it down into sections (so to speak), and then when she asked, you could say something like, "Well, today I pretty much wrapped up the part where Tina finds the wildebeest, but I really have only just started the part where Alberto learns how to skydive." Or, you know, whatever. But if she sort of knows what's going on, then you can give her what are kind of landmarks, without an actual bar chart.

Or maybe not...:) It's sort of the job of a mom to drive you crazy solely because she loves you and wants you to do well. You can't deprive her of that!

[sound-of-bells.livejournal.com]

I was writing a book this summer, and every single day when my father came home, he'd ask me what it was about. Every single time, I would tell him that I wasn't going to tell him until it was done. Written, edited, the whole deal. And yet he never stopped. It got to the point where I was starting to lose it.

Less annoying that your situation, but: I am empathetic. :P

[cleolinda.livejournal.com]

Nope, that sounds just about right. : )

[foresthouse.livejournal.com]

Oh dear, that part about your mom just about caused me to break out in hives. Because, seriously, all you have to do is imagine it's my mom (AND my dad), and they're asking about progress on finding a job instead of finishing a book, and we'd be living in the same family.

I went through about 3/4 of a year where I was trying and trying to find work, and every day my parents (whom I was living with) would ask me about my progress, and no matter what I tried, they wouldn't stop. I mean, I tried everything - explaining that I was working on it and it stressed me when they asked, yelling about it, crying about it (I was seriously depressed about the job hunt for a period)...nothing worked.

I will tell you what did, though. I moved out and moved in with my sister and her husband. Even though I was still doing temp work just as I had at home, I felt this weight lifted off of me by moving out. It was amazing.

Of course, you have to HAVE someplace to move to. That can be hard. I just lucked out.

[x-knees.livejournal.com]

It sure is! "Bad Blood" was awesome also because Luke Wilson starred in it and Mulder and Scully had differing opinions on how it all went down. It is in my top 10 fav episodes for the series.

[x-knees.livejournal.com]

I know!!!! And Scully is just as shocked when Mulder says the sheriff has such an aweful accent. The comedy in that ep is classic!

[stefficus.livejournal.com]

your october background is wunnerful!

and, irrelevantly, but because i immediately thought of you: knuuuuuuuut! (http://icanhascheezburger.com/2007/10/16/i-has-a-blanket-noo-they-be-stealin-my-blanket/)

[guinevere33.livejournal.com]

O Mighty Cleo, I am pondering doing a Tonks costume for Halloween, but I cannot for the life of my find your links to the awesome HP stills from OoTP. Halp?

[cleolinda.livejournal.com]

Was it here?

http://outnow.ch/Media/Img/2007/HarryPotter5/
http://outnow.ch/Media/Img/2007/HarryPotter5/movie.ws/24?w=1400&h=844

[guinevere33.livejournal.com]

Hrm, now that I think about it, it was probably a link to an ONTD post. But fortunately my Google-fu turned up this great shot (http://community.livejournal.com/ootpmoviepics/88895.html#cutid1) a little while ago, so I think I'm set. Thanks!

[rosivan.livejournal.com]

Hello there~ Sorry to bother, but I've seen some icons that you've made and I was wondering if you had an icon journal, or if those were just requests.. ^_^

[cleolinda.livejournal.com]

Yes! I also have that on Google Reader! (They have an hbp pics comm too now, although I don't think anything's really turned up yet.) I'd almost forgotten about it, and that version of the Tonks costume looks a lot more doable.

[cleolinda.livejournal.com]

Hee, no--just random icons I post now and then. Mostly they're just whatever I feel like doing. : )

[http://users.livejournal.com/_ravengirl/]

GASP. I was just alerted to this and my first thought was you :)
http://www.the-leaky-cauldron.org/2007/10/20/j-k-rowling-at-carnegie-hall-reveals-dumbledore-is-gay-neville-marries-hannah-abbott-and-scores-more

!!!!

I assume youve heard though. but still... gasp!

[cleolinda.livejournal.com]

Hee, I just updated for that specific reason. : )