It's All Pirates, All the Time!
Jul. 3rd, 2006 01:46 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
cleolindaIf you are not interested in 1) pirates or 2) Pirates of the Caribbean, this is going to be a very bad week for you at my journal.
"Orlando and I were sitting next to each other at the premiere, which was the first time I'd seen it, and we'd had a big talk and decided that if it was awful, we'd still leave the theater all smiles," she said.
Also, I read this article, very innocently not expecting to be spoiled on what I felt were a couple of MAJOR PLOT POINTS. I'm trying to go in as unspoiled as possible, to counteract the whole high-expectations thing. So if you see an article called "New 'Pirates' movie aims for box office treasure" and you don't want to be spoiled, stay away.
(Psssst: Word on the street is that there's a Snakes on a Plane novelization in bookstores now. I'm pretty sure it can't get any more awesome than this. Unless maybe they do Snakes on a Plane: The Musical!.)
Back to real life: Yay! I got another 2000 words in last night! I basically just started out reading over what I'd written the other day, started out touching up a few things, and ended up actually writing new stuff. It didn't have the narrative polish the other 2600 words had had--it was more in my "And then she walks down the stairs, I don't know what she sees then" style--but it got written all the same.
Meanwhile, everything is pretty much falling apart over here. The air conditioner downstairs won't condition, the icemaker in the fridge won't ice, my mother broke her new necklace, I knocked the dog over (it's a long story, but it involves pulling on his leash to make him stop chewing his leg and come inside, and instead of getting up and, you know, coming inside, he fell over on his back, waved his legs like a furry white cockroach, and gave me the most pitiful upside-down "Wha?" look. Hey, that wasn't a very long story after all), and then I whacked the shit out of my elbow. And now the air conditioner guy's left without fixing the dampers or whatever, and he's not coming back until Wednesday with reinforcements. Also, we don't even have any Coke for my rum.
So, since my mother was so harried when she stopped by to fix her necklace and talk to the guy, I offered to mop the kitchen floor for her so she wouldn't have to do it tomorrow. Much the way it is on ships at sea, swabbing the galley here is a pretty constant activity, because someone, by which I mean Meko, is always peeing on it. And since she's diabetic, it has a high sugar content, and... it's sticky, is what I'm trying to say. And we all walk around barefoot. So someone is usually mopping at least part of the floor at any given moment, because mere paper towels won't suffice for Lake Meko.
So my mother, micromanaging as usual (God bless her), pulls out the cleaning fluid she wants me to use. I'd last used a bottle of lavender-scented something or other from the laundry room; this was new. It was also bilingual. "They said it was a really good cleaner!" she said defensively, probably in response to my eyebrows. It's a tall green bottle of something called Fabuloso!, un limpiador multiuso con fragrancia duradera y la pasión de frutas. Somewhat interestingly, las frutas on the bottle aren't the usual lemons and oranges--they're apples and pears. Speaking of frutas, we had watermelon for lunch, which is probably not the most sustaining foodstuff ever, but it was hot and we were tired. I still think I got the better end of the deal, though, because even though I've spent the last hour swabbing, she had to flip the thermostat upstairs eighty times for the AC guy in the basement, haul the rest of the watermelon back downstairs, and wrestle the cat into the bathroom ("He's in there! No, no--the dining room! Don't slip on the passion of fruits!") to prevent an inopportune escape down the stairs. Pushing a sponge on a stick around the kitchen seemed like a picnic in comparison.
I'm supposed to be cleaning out my closet now, but... I think I'll try to write some more.
P.S. Say a little prayer for Roger Ebert.
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Date: 2006-07-03 06:48 pm (UTC)I was like "Why do you need to read it. It's snakes. On a Plane. What do you THINK is going to happen?"
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Date: 2006-07-03 06:49 pm (UTC)OH MAN did I crack up.
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Date: 2006-07-03 06:49 pm (UTC)Oh Lordy, I haven't laughed that hard in ages. I can just see it now... Get these mother f*ckin' snakes off my plane... uh huh uh huh uh huh... mother f*ckin' snakes... uh huh uh huh uh huh
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Date: 2006-07-03 06:51 pm (UTC)Lake Meko made me laugh. :o)
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Date: 2006-07-03 07:20 pm (UTC)For the same reason that, Yes! We have no bananas? Or maybe it's a more a question of, Where have all the colas gone?
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Date: 2006-07-03 06:58 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-07-03 07:02 pm (UTC)If you are not interested in 1) pirates or 2) Pirates of the Caribbean, this is going to be a very bad week for you at my journal.
I have been looking forward to this film for so long, it's pathetic.
In conclusion, Arrrrrr!
"Don't slip on the passion of fruits!"
I find this a terribly amusing phrase, for some reason.
*crosses fingers for Ebert*
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Date: 2006-07-03 07:05 pm (UTC)(no subject)
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Date: 2006-07-03 07:03 pm (UTC)I have just discovered my life goal. Thank you!
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Date: 2006-07-03 07:08 pm (UTC)Seriously, my jewelry counter smelled like I had a pimp hiding in my diamonds for the rest of the night.
Cleaned real good though.
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Date: 2006-07-03 07:18 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-07-03 07:39 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-07-03 07:25 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-07-03 07:25 pm (UTC)Soundtrack by Andrew Lloyd Weber with such gems as "All I Asp of You", "Hissing You Were Somehow Here Again" and the haunting "Music of the Bite".
And I'm done with my pun quota of the day.
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Date: 2006-07-03 07:30 pm (UTC)(no subject)
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Date: 2006-07-03 07:29 pm (UTC)(Or, omg! If PotC or Snakes on a Plane both somehow involved ninjas and robots. But I guess I'll have to wait for Transformers for the robots.)
Oh man, do I feel your air conditioning woes. Ours breaks every couple weeks. I guess the Florida heat has been oppressing it too much.
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Date: 2006-07-03 07:30 pm (UTC)I died of laughter the first time I saw an ad for this game. I mean, COME ON. XD
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Date: 2006-07-03 07:44 pm (UTC)Psshhht, never stopped me.
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Date: 2006-07-03 07:45 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-07-03 07:52 pm (UTC)(no subject)
From:no subject
Date: 2006-07-03 07:47 pm (UTC)I don't know why Don't slip in the passion of fruits! made me laugh as hard as it did. Bilingual humor is the best kind.
I heard about ol' Roger. I always kinda liked him. Don't always agree with his reviews, but I do like that he seems to understand what each movie is AIMING for and bases it on those merits. Suerte a Roger!
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Date: 2006-07-03 07:54 pm (UTC)cheers here's to pirates! arrr!
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Date: 2006-07-03 08:34 pm (UTC)"I was at my Uncle's wedding a couple months ago and at the altar the bride said she couldn't go through with it (poor Uncle Jim). everyone was dead silent so I just spoke up (stupidly) and yelled out "Weddings! I love weddings! Drinks all around!". "
AWKWARD.
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Date: 2006-07-03 07:56 pm (UTC)poor ebert. i know he's disliked by many... but i enjoy his reviews, even when he's being a douche.
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Date: 2006-07-03 09:10 pm (UTC)(no subject)
From:no subject
Date: 2006-07-03 08:04 pm (UTC)It's probably just because I'm in Provincetown, which sort of has a Gay Pride parade daily, but my mind immediately went to "the product of gay sex?" instead of cleaner.
Okay, shutting up now.
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Date: 2006-07-03 08:21 pm (UTC)That just made me very very happy.
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Date: 2006-07-03 08:29 pm (UTC)"On the plane! On the plane!"
"And where's that (*&^%$ plane?"
"In Spain! In Spain!"
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Date: 2006-07-04 01:54 am (UTC)SO. SO. MUCH. XDDDDD
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Date: 2006-07-03 08:43 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-07-03 09:05 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-07-03 09:06 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-07-03 09:17 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-07-03 09:12 pm (UTC)Did you see the day they did the imdn poll about what to call a sequel for Snakes on a Plane? I can't remember all of them, but some were Snakes on a Train, Snakes on the Brain, Snakes on Two Planes, Snakes on a Plane Episode 2: The Revenge of the Snakes, Lord of the Snakes, etc.
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Date: 2006-07-03 09:18 pm (UTC)