Woe is my deadline

Y'all have been so sweet, but... I don't quite think you understand the depth of the shit I'm in. My deadline is--was--today, and I so incredibly didn't make it. You know how I keep talking about the Matrix? Yeah. It's almost done. And it's the only one. Now you see why I'm panicking. But, really--I can't write any harder or faster; it's not like they can break out the whip and punish me because I'm not doing the best and the most I can do. I'm basically just hoping for mercy and understanding at this point.

P.S. My sore throat is about to drive me nuts.

More on the tsunami destruction:

Sandra Bullock is good people.

I had an idea myself. Let's say I open a new Cafe Press store--I think my old one is kind of dead--and put a variety of designs up. The first one I'm thinking about is, quite simply, "woe." All lowercase, probably a light blue, period. Not because it has anything to do with tsunamis, mind you--just because people have mentioned that they like "woe" in the Lost recaps and such. Maybe another design could be "OH NOES". I'd mark up all the items one dollar, maybe two. All the money would go to charity. But see, each design would have a different substore, and you could say, "This month, all profits go to Doctors Without Borders for tsunami relief." So you could end up supporting different things at various times, as you felt the need.

(By the way: I didn't come up with "woe" and "OH NOES"--they're just kind of common slang--and I could certainly never take money made off something that... well, simple. Like, I didn't think of it, and I'm not contributing an original art design or anything. The only reason to do this is for charity.)

So, after those two, what I want to know from y'all is: Which lines from my journal/movie parodies/TV recaps do you think would work well on merchandise (FOR CHARITY)? We would have to step carefully--I know that all character names in LOTR and Harry Potter are trademarked to high heaven, but you can't trademark a name like "Jack," I wouldn't think, so "Captain Doctor Hero Jack" would be fine. "Phantom of the Fiction Workshop" is trickier, because I don't know how much of the whole Phantom of the Opera thing is public domain because of the age of the original novel, and how much is trademarked because of Andrew Lloyd Webber. But I figure, anything you think would look good on a mug or a sticker or a t-shirt, let's try it.

(I would encourage anyone else to look through their journal and open a shop of their own, too. I'm not doing it because I think my writing is all that great--I'm doing it because I can, basically.)

To that end, does anyone know some good free-for-commercial-use fonts off the top of their head? I've gone hunting for them before, and it's incredibly time-consuming, so if anyone has a good recommendation at their fingertips, that'd be great. So, comments: lines you would actually be willing to pay to have on a mug, and good fonts that can be used for commercial products. At this point, proceeds would go towards tsunami relief (probably Doctors Without Borders) and 4christina.org.