cleolinda | Snow: let me explain it

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Snow: let me explain it

The thing you have to understand about snow panic in Alabama is that it's not about the snow. Mostly, it's about us not being prepared for snow; a meager two inches is considered an epic blizzard. It's also about the side effects of snow--I live in a heavily-wooded suburban area full of giant, beautiful, old trees. Very old trees. And they all have dead branches here and there hanging on by a shred of bark, so when you have just enough snow to weigh them down, they break off and fall onto the power lines. Or worse, the entire tree is mostly dead and it falls across the road or onto (and usually through) your house. There was one Epic Two-Inch Snow that ended up with a three-foot-thick, forty-foot-long pine lying across our street (and in what used to be someone's sun room), while live power lines were sparking in the road. In fact, my mother reported last night that, as she was driving home, she saw a number of official-looking trucks on the side of the road, presumably stationed for speedy tree removal.

It's also about the ice. None of us know how to drive on it, because we don't get it often enough to figure out how and then retain that knowledge. One time there was a Special News Report on Safe Winter Weather Driving, and I am serious, it was, in its entirety, "Drive slow." And now, over to Jim with the sports! So basically, entire schools, businesses, and highways will be shut down for safety reasons ~~while all of Chicago points and laughs~~. I am not even kidding: my sister may not be able to get to work on Friday--

Oh God. I just realized that if we are all iced in together for the next four days, a remake of The Shining is going to break out.

While we're here, a teensy bit of Twi-spam, because I am getting a lot of email about this, and also, I enjoy the progression of the headlines:

Attn. Jackson Rathbone: Missing something?

'Eclipse' Script Wasn't Leaked, Says Summit.

Nikki Finke: Yes, That Leaked Movie Script Is 'Eclipse.'

1. I don't want to read it. I'm to a point where I don't even watch clips of movies I know I want to see anymore. I get so bored in the theater if I feel like I've already seen the movie. 2. I suspect the wink emoticon in the script (as seen at the first link) is forced product-placement sarcasm from screenwriter Melissa Rosenberg. 3. My dazzle is somewhat chagrined that (people tell me) the werewolf-vampire nose-fist bump is not in this version of the script, because, quite honestly, the Edward/Seth stuff is the only thing I find remotely likeable about Book!Edward. Also: COME ON! WEREWOLF-VAMPIRE NOSE-FIST BUMP! If there is anything funnier than that, I can't think of it right now.

Meanwhile, I am trying to work--I got a good bit of novel note-sorting and categorizing done yesterday--but am having a hell of a time. Lots of interruptions, and I can't concentrate for shit. Also, my new calendars (50% off!) came in from Amazon yesterday, but without the books I had bought for research, and then I realized I had forgotten to order a couple of other researchy things anyway, fnarr. Also-also, I bought another pair of fingerless gloves because I was concerned that my homemade recycled ones were fraying a bit from being worn so much, and I am really hoping they arrive before the cold snap is over. This is Alabama, after all.

OH OH OH I ALMOST FORGOT I have two questions to ask you:

1) How do we get e-books from my stepfather's Kindle onto my parents' computer? They can't figure out how.

2) Those identity protection/theft-prevention services, are any of them actually any good?

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I'm from Nebraska, but currently living in California. I do the point and laugh thing on the rare occasions it rains in San Diego, because people here have no idea how to handle wet roads. Good thing it never freezes. It'd be a DISASTER ZONE.

Also, I noticed on the linked script pages it talks about Jacobs failnote. I have a sinking feeling they really did make him write all that stuff down, and then cross it out for the movie. *facepalm*

Honey, never move to my old neighborhood. See, I lived on a mountain in Valley Forge National Historical Park, so all the stuff you described occurred with alarming regularity when there was ANY precipitation. It got to the point where I was so used to it by age 11 that I would prep all the candles and oil lamps as soon as I heard a thunderstorm was coming. It was inevitable that the power would go out. The trees mostly miss the houses, but there was one that blocked our garage for a week.

Also, in the case of snow, we were also saddled with cars and school buses breaking down at the foot of the mountain. 7th grade featured me walking the two miles home from the foot of the mountain, in a foot of snow.

So, I reiterate: don't move north, and if you must, make sure it's not a mountainous region.

Regarding ice: make sure to hit it straight on and at a constant speed. Any attempts to change direction or velocity will make you lose total control.

OK, Northerner's rant over!

Correction: in Southern England.

Those of us who live alongside the Pennines or higher feel very superior at times like this.

That sounds like Massachusetts, too, where we're known from driving like, well, we're called "Massholes" for a reason. The first snow of the year and we're skipping and slipping around like a greased up kid on a Slip 'n' Slide.

nope, same last name even!

that's why i was so freaked out by it! :)
maybe you are long lost cousins! :)

(my friend, mother of Beth, is named Jamie)

Yeah, I live in Tuscaloosa, so you can imagine how people are freaked out that the game may be interrupted by James Spann or the power may go out completely (OMG HOW WILL WE WATCH TEH FOOTBALL?!?)

I do hope they close everything down here though. And that everyone stays safe, and not just in Alabama.

This year has been pretty bad, admittedly... but I imagine the Canadians are laughing at us so hard.

We're up to about 9 inches in the north east? My car is totally snowed in, but luckily I can walk to work.

Ooh, where are you?

Also, 4 wheel drive is for going through deep snow or mud. It won't help you stop when all 4 wheels are on ice.

OH MY GOD. My FIL repeats this every. single. winter. Over and over again. We've started telling him that we're going to go home at 80 and then hit the brakes to get into the driveway right behind a little old lady, because, as we have 4wd, we should be fine, right??

I'm near Newcastle and we don't have anywhere near that much. I am on the coast though. Where are you?

West Yorkshire born n bred (Broad in t'shoulders - thick in t'head) but currently residing in Somerset for the week and laughing heartily at the news.

Germany's actually quite good about the whole snow thing, I mean, when they clear the streets they just make them MORE slippery but you learn to deal with it....

but god, I remember Georgia two years ago. People seriously said to me: Well I've never been to school when there was snow on the ground it just doesn't happen.
I mean, what? WHAT? We need 20 stupid centimeters here for them to even CONSIDER a snow day!

Anyway, I love snow, and I will never stop loving it.

Durham city, and it's horrific at the moment.

We were doing ok until Tuesday, really, but then the stuff overnight and the other bits during the day seem to have pushed us too far. I'm hoping the roads will be better tomorrow, because my staff are having a really hard time getting in and out. Buses are mostly cancelled, you can't get a taxi for love nor money... it's interesting to say the least.

(House party at mine! Whoo!)

:D I tend to repeat it a lot when I'm riding with my dad in his truck. And I grumble it at the trucks and SUVs that speed past me on the highway.

But I have good reason. Just last month some SUV took a turn way too fast and went careening over into my lane and nearly hit me head on.

The snow is generally not the big problem (as long as you're not driving) - it's when the snow freezes overnight and all the old trees fall down and the power goes out for days and days.

Here in Georgia too. That, and the house and apartment fires from people leaving their space heaters on, or the homeless setting fires in abandoned buildings, or pipes exploding from freezing. I mean, I guess these things happen in other places too, but for one, our buildings are probably not as well insulated here.

Bah! Getting about is ridiculous. My mam is disabled and relies on the car, but she can't even safely walk to is because of the ice, and then there'd be the worry of driving on such icy roads.

I was meant to be getting a package delivered and everything. I payed extra to have it sent by special post and wish I hadn't bothered. Royal Mail is getting through fine but DPD seem to be having trouble. -MASSIVE FROWN-

Damn snow = [

Hi there, fellow NC-er! I'm sure the people in the mountains are used to it, but here in the piedmont people FLIP. A. SHIT. if there's even like a 2% chance of snow. Everyone has to clean out the grocery stores and schools close because OMG YOU TOTALLY CAN'T DRIVE IF LOOKS LIKE SNOW! and crap. I've never driven in the snow, but honestly. We thoroughly salt the roads two days before the slightest chance of snow, how bad can it be? I have no idea what the percentage of us getting snow tomorrow is or how much we might get, but it's going to be ridiculous.

And I also have to admit that the ONTD comments swallowed me for a long time, much to the detriment of the progress of college application essays, heh...

Also, icon love!

Broad in t'shoulders - thick in t'head) Hah, my driving instructor taught me that one when I was 17! (Lancashire lass, represent.)

I live waaay up in Durham these days, though.

Hee! Thank you!

I literally can't imagine -22. It's been down to about 15 or so here (Georgia) for lows and I just... yeah. Can't imagine I'd deal with it well. I for one don't have a suitable wardrobe even for this weather. No LL Beans around here ;)

Lancashire? Us doant be so fond o'thee and thy kin.

Lol. 400 year old war represent.

At least you're on the right side of the Pennines now. How bad is it up Durham way then? Got more than a foot?

That's exactly what happened in Buffalo in 2006 - we had like a foot of snow in early October, which NEVER happens. This year we didn't get anything substantial until just before Christmas. It was a disaster because all the tree branches still had leaves on them. Yuck. The only positive was that I got to watch it all on TV, because I was in Florida visiting my sister. Muahahaha.

Dude, I'm from the piedmont too! Small world. And I know what you mean about the shit-flipping, it's ridiculous. Honestly, driving in snow is not the worst thing in the world. I'm originally from Ohio, moved to NC when I was 12, and when I was learning to drive many many years ago, it snowed and my dad said "get in the car, you're going to learn how to drive in this." Most of the time it's just a matter of using a lower gear and going at a relatively slow speed and avoiding other cars (that's what REALLY bothers me, those assholes who act like they're invincible and tailgate you - it makes it hard to feel sorry for them when they inevitably spin out and end up in a ditch). That being said, I really hope it doesn't snow tomorrow. I'm sick of it. I was sick of it the week before Christmas.

I live in an old house, and with the weather being the way it has for the past few weeks, I have been absolutely petrified of my power going out and my pipes freezing. Miraculously enough, neither of those things has happened...and I probably just jinxed myself. Great.

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